


Punk Rock Princess

by hapakitsune



Category: Bandom, Cobra Starship, The Academy Is...
Genre: Alternate Universe - Always a Different Sex, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-06-24
Updated: 2009-06-24
Packaged: 2018-03-29 20:50:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 21,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3910201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hapakitsune/pseuds/hapakitsune
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gabriela Saporta isn't some pop princess. From Humble Beginnings to Midtown to Cobra Starship, she lives life her own way and damn the consequences.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Punk Rock Princess

  
  
_I'm not some pop princess. Fuck that. I don't have any of these perfect childhood stories. I'm a fucking immigrant, okay? I grew up in a one bedroom apartment in Queens and my family didn't even have green cards or anything._  
  
 _\- Gabe Saporta, Alternative Press Magazine_  
  
  
Gabi moves to America when she's four and her brother Ricky is two; sometimes she wishes she hadn't, but other times she's so fucking grateful that she feels guilty. New York City is a startling change from Uruguay, with the loud, fast-talking and fast-walking urbanites everywhere, the tall, shiny buildings, and the language that she doesn't know around her all the time.  
  
Her first real experience with music, with _rock and roll_ music – something that seems alien and ridiculously exotic to her when she's young – is listening to the tinny sound of the radio that her dad buys for her from a pawn shop. She has to hold it close to her face to be able to hear it, but she listens to it all the time.  
  
She gets her first album when she's five years old and they've been living in Queens for a little over a year. Her dad is out selling scarves on the street and her mother is working as a temp to help get a little more money for rent. Gabi and her little brother Ricky are usually left with the neighbor, a sixteen year old girl named Lucinda who speaks Spanish and English. Gabi still really only knows Spanish (the only English words Gabi knows how to say are, "hello", "thank you", and "good-bye"), so it's good to have the older girl around.  
  
By this time, Gabi has already developed an affection for what Lucinda calls "hair metal". Lucinda seems to find it pretty hilarious and indulges Gabi by playing her albums and showing her which stations play rock music. It's early October and Lucinda asks Gabi's parents for permission to take them out into the city and takes the kids to a record store for the day, as sort of a birthday present for Gabi.  
  
Gabi is looking through one of the bargain bins at a record store when she finds the Whitesnake album. She's fascinated by the cover, staring at the plain wax seal on the front when Lucinda comes over, looks over Gabi's shoulder, and tells her in Spanish, "That has that song you like, the one you always try to record from the radio." She hums softly and Gabi recognizes it after a moment. She's never been able to catch the whole song, always coming in a minute from the end, or just in time to hear the closing chords, but she likes the way it sounds.  
  
"Oh," she says, looking at the cover longingly, and she's about to put the record back down when Lucinda stops her and asks, "Gabriela, do you want it?"  
  
Gabi nods, hesitantly. Ricky is standing on tiptoe, tiny hands bracing himself on the edge of the bin, his eyes wide with curiosity. He blinks up at her and smiles, pearly teeth tiny and white.  
  
Lucinda says, "I'll go buy it for you," and picks Ricky up, balancing him on her hip. She takes the album from Gabi's hands goes up to the counter, sacrificing her carefully allotted magazine money to buy the album for Gabi. Gabi tries to stop her, but Lucinda waves her off. Lucinda flirts with the tattooed cashier for a little bit afterwards, absently handing Gabi the record and ignoring her thanks. The cashier laughs when Lucinda explains that she bought it for Gabi and says, "She has good taste."  
  
Gabi clutches the album the entire bus ride home, leaving sweaty fingerprints on the case. She's not tall enough to reach the record player, so Lucinda puts it on for her and they sit on the floor of the Saportas' apartment together while it plays, Lucinda rocking Ricky gently and Gabi tapping her fingers to the beat.  
  
  
  
They spend several years in New York, and Gabi learns English, attends a private Jewish elementary school, and discovers Bon Jovi, in that order. She's given the album _New Jersey_ by a friend and she instantly falls in love. She makes her mom buy her acid-washed jeans and tries to convince her mom to let her get feathered hair, but her mom clicks her tongue and says, "But you have such beautiful curly hair, Gabriela," and Gabi gives up.  
  
(Later, in high school, she goes through a brief phase where she straightens her hair every day, letting it fall long and shining to her elbows. Then she gets fed up with the amount of work and cuts her hair as short as she can without looking ridiculous. Eventually, she stops trying and lets her hair do its thing because really, she just doesn't care enough to go to the trouble.)  
Gabi feels out of place at her elitist private school; she doesn't learn until later that the reason she went there was because it was the one school that would accept her despite the facts that she was an illegal immigrant and her family could not afford private school. A local temple gives their family the money to send Gabi and Ricky to school; Jeannette doesn't like taking charity, but they have no other options. Most of Gabi’s classmates are wealthy, living in lavish apartments or mansions, while Gabi returns home to a one-bedroom apartment and retreats behind the flimsy protection of a thin cotton curtain while her parents argue over money.  
  
She first understands the difference between herself and her classmates when Alana Bruk invites Gabi to her birthday party. Gabi carefully picks out a present from a cheap toys store with her mom, and dresses neatly in her nicest clothes, but the bus doesn't stop anywhere near Alana's house, and they ends up having to walk up a huge hill and down a long, tree-lined driveway to get to the house. Alana's house is twice the size of Gabi's apartment _building_ and all the mothers there are wearing designer clothes. Gabi sees her mom look down at her own carefully patched clothes ruefully before making her excuses and leaving. When she returns to pick Gabi up, she doesn't come inside the house.  
  
Gabi asks her mom about it that night and Jeannette looks at her daughter for a long moment before telling her in a quiet, tight voice, "Your dad has to go through medical school again, sweetie, and that's expensive. We don't have a lot of money to spend on luxuries."  
  
Gabi nods and says, "But that's good right? Because then Dad can be a doctor again?"  
  
(Her dad graduates from med school when she's eleven and they go to his graduation as a family. It's a quiet, subdued affair, but it has a really good buffet. Jeannette pragmatically takes some to go; they're still strapped for money. Diego hugs Gabi and Ricky, telling them, "Papa can be a doctor again.")  
  
"That's right," Jeannette tells Gabi, her voice oddly strained. "Good night." She kisses Gabi's forehead and tugs the curtain back into place.  
  
Gabi lies awake late into the night, trying to figure out why her mother had sounded so angry.  
  
  
  
When her parents move them to New Jersey, she's not as upset as maybe she should be, because _New Jersey._ It must be a fucking awesome place if Bon Jovi is from there, she thinks, except she doesn't think the word _fucking_ because she's only ten.  
  
Jersey, as it turns out, isn't quite what she thought it would be like, but there is still something really great about it. Their neighbors are all incredibly nice, even though the Saportas are just about the only Hispanic family on their street (and one of the only mixed families, as well). Almost everyone near them is either Italian or Jewish, so they have to fight off offerings of food for almost a month after they move in, especially when the neighborhood housewives learn that Diego is setting up a practice in town.  
  
"You got to be nice to doctors," Mrs. Hein says to Gabi's mother when she delivers her third casserole. "You never know when you'll need one."  
  
Gabi goes to public school and it's weird being one of the only kids in her class to speak Spanish, even more so than in New York, and sometimes the others make fun of her when she slips up and forgets. (Her first crush is notable only because she gets flustered and blurts out, "Me gusta usted," rather than saying, "I like you." The boy in question stares at her and says, " _English_.")  
  
She's also one of the few Jewish kids in her class and when they discuss religion, they always look to Gabi and David (the other Jewish boy in her class) to talk about Judaism. When the school decorates for Christmas, she digs out the Magen David necklace her parents bought her for Hanukkah the year before and wears it to school defiantly. She triumphantly points out that not only do they get _eight_ days for their winter holiday, they also get tons of other holidays throughout the year with _lots_ of food. All of her classmates are suitably envious.  
  
When she thinks about it later, she suspects that her affinity for partying comes from her Jewish upbringing. Her family is Orthodox Jewish; they've always kept kosher (though Gabi becomes vegan after meeting a vegan at summer camp when she's thirteen) and they celebrate every major holiday. Every holiday is something of a party with tons of food and wine. Gabi loves Hanukkah just for the latkes and the presents, but she has a deep love for Tu B'Shvat and the tradition of planting trees. She plants an apple tree in their backyard when she's eleven and she watches it grow into a sapling, proud that _her_ tree grows tall and strong.  
  
(She takes Bill there, when she's older. She wants him to see her family home. He pats the trunk, looking a little awed and says, "You say this has been here since you were eleven?"  
  
She nods and says, "Almost twenty years, I guess." She reaches up and picks a ripened red apple off the tree. "My mom used them for apple pies, before she and my dad split."  
  
Bill takes the apple from her hand, their fingers brushing. "It's like it's your spirit," he said thoughtfully, looking up through the leaves. "Or it's a part of you, maybe. You plant it and it stays strong. Its roots are in your first real home." He looks at her, his eyes serious. "Don't you think that's significant?"  
  
Gabi looks back at him and feels light and giddy. This, she thinks, is why I like him so much. "You are maybe overanalyzing it," she says with a half smile. "But then, I was a philosophy major, so I guess see your point."  
  
He laughs and gently shoves her shoulder before kissing her sweetly, his hand curling around the nape of her neck. She knots her hand in his shirt and tugs him in closer, the sun warming her back.  
  
When they get married, William suggests that the ceremony be performed under the tree. It is perhaps one of the weirdest ceremonies ever, as Gabi is not even wearing a white dress, the apple tree is their huppa, and the wedding cake is not a cake, but an apple pie. Nate brings an apple liqueur he distilled in his backyard, and they all get totally wasted.)  
  
Gabi has her first major growth spurt going into eighth grade and she instantly becomes taller than most of her classmates. That's when she gets her first period, and that's also when she decides that fuck this girl business, she'd rather be a guy.  
  
(Incidentally, this is the one period of her life where Gabi actually identifies with her mother. Jeanette, who loves her daughter but doesn't really understand her, latches onto this rite of womanhood with an air of desperation. One of Gabi's most vivid memories is the way her mother's red hair is streaked with white as she bends her head to rummage out tampons from the cabinet under the sink in the bathroom. When they'd first moved to America, there hadn't been even a single grey hair.)  
  
Gabi hates feeling awkward in her own skin, because she doesn't _want_ to care what anyone thinks about her, but it's hard not to feel out of place when she's one of the few Hispanics, one of the few Jews, and certainly the only Hispanic Jew at her school. She towers over nearly everyone in her grade and despite what her dad tells her, the others don't catch up to her, because she keeps growing, finally stopping at five feet and eleven inches in her bare feet. (She’s only grateful for her height later in life, when William expresses delight over the fact that he doesn’t have to bend in half to kiss her.)  
  
She meets Rob when she's thirteen, three weeks after her Bat Mitzvah (which is actually really fun and she makes a killing. She uses the money to buy her first guitar, a beautiful acoustic), at the Bar Mitzvah for one of the boys who goes to her temple. He's the friend of a friend (Josh Scott-Dicker, who's in her English class, used to play on a softball team with Rob) and he sees her sitting against the wall drinking punch.  
  
He sits next to her and asks with easy camaraderie, "So why aren't you dancing?"  
  
"Not that good at it," she replies with a half-smile. He laughs and touches her shoulder lightly. He doesn't seem creepy or anything, so she doesn't flinch away.  
  
"I'm Rob," he says, smiling.  
  
"I'm Gabi," she replies, and somehow they get embroiled in a discussion about music until the party winds down. He writes his number on the back of a napkin and tells her that they should go to a gig sometime.  
  
Her parents don't like it, but she starts going to concerts in the city with Rob and some of his friends. There are a couple other girls who go with them, so she's not alone, but most of them won't go into the pit with her. Josh, who comes along with them, tells Gabi that he's impressed that she'll actually go into the pit. She shrugs and says, "What's there to be afraid of?"  
  
Josh grins and says, "Well, sometimes shit goes down. You know. I got beer spilled all over me this one time and then I sprained an ankle when somebody stepped on my foot. ."  
  
Gabi shakes her head and shoots back, "I grew up in a one-bedroom apartment in Queens."  
  
Josh takes a moment to consider this before agreeing. "Yeah, you’re pretty fucking jaded, aren’t you." The night air is cold and she shivers, the air cooling the sweat on her skin. He notices and takes off his jacket. "Come on, your dad will kill me if you get sick."  
  
"I'm not going to get sick from being out at night," Gabi protests, but she lets him help her into his jacket. It's warm from his body heat and smells like his aftershave. Gabi breathes it in and tugs the jacket closed.  
  
  
  
The summer going into high school, her parents sign her up for camp and since it's either that or summer school, she goes to camp for two weeks. It's a real _camp_ , with cabins and canoeing and archery. Ricky goes as well, but he's in a different age group and she doesn't see him except occasionally during meals.  
  
She’s assigned to a group that consists of the girls in her cabin and the boys in the ‘brother’ cabin across the lake. Their counselors are a perky blond Rutgers student named Kevin and a slightly bitchy Physics major from Princeton named Linda. (Kevin and Linda act like they hate each other, but Gabi goes out late one night when she can't sleep and sees them making out on the edge of the lake, Linda's hands clutching desperately at Kevin's stupidly spiky hair. Gabi backs away, not wanting to intrude, but she can't banish the image from her head for the rest of the summer.)  
  
In Gabi's group is a boy named Jay and he's the biggest hippie she's ever met (even including Ryan Ross, who she mentally compares to Jay when she meets him following the Keltie Transformation). He has a different tie-dye shirt for each day and he sometimes will touch a tree and just close his eyes, tilting his face up to the sun.  
  
He doesn't eat meat, either, and when Gabi finally works up the nerve to ask why, he smiles beatifically, teeth white against his tan skin.  
  
"We live in a civilized society," he points out. "There are plenty of alternatives to meat. Why should we make an animal suffer?"  
  
Gabi mulls it over that night at the campfire, absently setting her marshmallows on fire in the process. She realizes that Jay's right, and it's not like they know for sure that animals have no consciousness. So when she returns home, she declares that she intends to be a vegetarian, much to her mother's dismay. (She briefly forgets at Lara Gold's Bat Mitzvah and is eating kosher spaghetti and meatballs when Lara asks, "I thought you were vegetarian now?"  
  
Gabi drops the plate and says, " _Fuck_." Lara laughs, not meanly, and tugs on a curl that had come loose from Gabi's ponytail.)  
  
Jay also gives her a copy of _On the Road_ and she realizes after reading it that the life laid out for her – college, job, 2.5 kids and a dog – doesn't _have_ to be her life. When she returns home, she starts teaching herself bass in earnest. She has no rhythm, but she forces herself to learn, playing along to her Nirvana records until she can feel the beat resonating in her bones. She dreams of joining a band and sometimes talks to Rob about one day playing music together.  
  
Josh asks her out two months into sophomore year. She's fifteen, and she's had a slight crush on him for the past year. He kicks the ground awkwardly when he asks and when she says yes, he smiles, brightly, and takes her hand tentatively in his.  
  
They have sex on their one month anniversary. It's the first time for both of them, and it's pretty fucking awkward, to be honest. But he's nice enough to make sure she comes, so it could have been worse. She's heard horror stories from some of their friends about erectile dysfunction or getting walked in on. (They're careful to be sure that they're alone and that they use as much protection as possible. Gabi's been on the pill for six months already anyway, just to help regulate her periods.)  
  
Later, she convinces him to let her play bass in his band. She sometimes suspects that he only agreed so that she'll continue to sleep with him, but the other guys don't make that many jokes about them, so she's willing to let it slide.  
  
It's around this time that her mother files for divorce. Gabi is sitting in the living room doing homework when Jeannette comes home and slides the folder across the table to Diego, who takes it cautiously.  
  
"What is this?" he asks, voice rough. Gabi looks up, watching the reflection of the kitchen off their small television, and sees her mother sit down across from her dad.  
  
"Open it," Jeannette tells him. Diego does, slowly, and Gabi sees his face _crumple_ in one horrible moment. "I'm sorry, Diego."  
  
"Jeannette," he says plaintively, reaching out to her. She pulls her hand away from his and he bites his lip. "Don't do this. Don't leave. We have _children_. They need you."  
  
Jeannette blinks and looks over to the living room. "Gabriela," she says sharply. "Go to your room."  
  
Gabi glares at her, because she's not entirely sure what's going on, but she knows that her dad is crushed and she knows that her dad is her hero. "Why?"  
  
"Do what your mother says," Diego orders her tiredly. Gabi reluctantly gathers her things and heads for the stairs, but she stops at the top landing and listens as hard as she can.  
  
"Diego, I just – I can't do this any more," she hears her mother say, not sounding very remorseful at all.  
  
"Jeannette," Diego pleads desperately. "Think of our _children_."  
  
"They'll still have me," Jeannette points out. Gabi hears her sigh. "It's not that I'm not grateful. You helped me get to America, to a place where I can pursue my dreams. I want that freedom, Diego. I'll still be around for them, I promise."  
  
"Was that all this was for you? A stepping stone?" Diego's voice cracks on the last word and there's an awful silence.  
  
Gabi can't listen any longer, to the way her father sounds as though he's on the brink of tears. She retreats to her bedroom and pulls out her walkman, listening to the album Rob had leant her the week before. But her traitorous memory keeps replaying the instant where her father had read the papers and she wants to cry.  
  
  
  
Two nights later, her parents call a family meeting. Jeannette looks composed and unemotional, but Diego's eyes are red as if he's been crying. Ricky is confused, shooting glances at each of their parents before reaching out for Gabi's hand. She lets him, even though normally she'd tell him to fuck off, and she glares at her mother, whose icy composure cracks under her daughter's scrutiny.  
  
Jeannette shifts uncomfortably and begins by saying, "Gabriela, Ricardo – I'm afraid we have bad news." Jeannette falters here, because Gabi's glare has intensified. There's a horrible, pregnant beat of silence.  
  
Diego finally speaks up, his voice thick, "Your mother and I are getting a divorce."  
  
Ricky gasps and clutches at Gabi's hand tightly. "But _why_?" he asks plaintively.  
  
Gabriela stands up abruptly, releasing Ricky's hand, unwilling to listen to whatever bullshit her parents decided to run with. Jeannette says sharply, "Gabriela, sit down."  
  
"Fuck you," Gabi says, very clearly. "You used Dad to get out of Uruguay and now that he's settled, now that Ricky and I are grown, you think you can leave us without feeling guilty. This is _your fault_."  
  
"Gabriela," Diego says wearily. "Please." His voice cracks on the last syllable of her name and he looks tired, broken.  
  
She sits.  
  
"Sometimes," Jeannette continues as though she wants to pretend nothing had happened, but her voice is shaking a little. Gabi is viciously pleased by this. "Sometimes, people just grow apart."  
  
Ricky looks at Gabi and then mimics her defiance, crossing his arms and jutting his jaw. "Fine," he says coolly. "Whatever."  
  
What follows in the months afterward is a horrific stream of divorce and custody proceedings. Gabi refuses, point blank, to go with her mother. Jeannette unsuccessfully tries to sue for custody, and in the end, Ricky chooses their dad as well.  
  
Embittered by the experience and by her children turning on her, Jeannette turns her attention to Diego's money. The costs of the lawyer eat up a good portion of his life savings and Jeannette manages to stake a claim on a healthy portion of the rest.  
  
(Later, she'll make several attempts to reconnect with her children. Ricky eventually reconciles with her to some degree, but Gabi, who idolizes her father, never forgives Jeannette for destroying Diego, who never remarries, never even dates again. Jeannette sends cards on Gabi's birthday and sends a bouquet of flowers when Gabi's in the hospital getting vocal cord surgery.  
  
While Gabi appreciates and respects the effort, she doesn't even invite Jeannette to her wedding.)  
  
Diego tries to get Gabi and Ricky to see a therapist, which Gabi refuses to do. What she _does_ do is write a song, her first ever. It gets ripped to shreds and reworked when she timidly offers it to her band, but most of the lyrics remain intact. Whenever they play it, Gabi presses her fingers a little harder against the strings.  
  
  
  
She gets a box-cutter pulled on her at CBGB's after accidentally bumping into a guy whose girlfriend thinks Gabi's making a pass. Josh shows up and defuses the situation pretty quickly, but it takes a while for Gabi's heartbeat to slow down. Josh slides his arm around her waist, the tips of his fingers resting just inside the waistband of her jeans. He leans in and half-shouts, "Are you okay?"  
  
Her mouth is dry and suddenly she feels claustrophobic and hemmed in by the crowds of people. "Can we go outside?"  
  
Josh nods and jerks his head at Rob. They hustle for the exit, Gabi feeling a bit like an over-dramatic pop star who needs to be taken out of a fan situation.  
  
Gabi, once they get outside, says, "Let's not go back here, okay?" She dimly notices that her hands are shaking.  
  
Rob shakes his head and says, "Well, yeah." He slaps her on the back comfortingly, but she hears the trembling in his voice when he tells Josh to get a cab.  
  
  
  
The basement shows are actually Rob's idea, but they catch on pretty quickly and soon it becomes common knowledge that in the suburbs of Jersey, there'll be a basement show _somewhere_. The shows attract a decent number of bands, and Gabi's father quietly expresses his relief that she isn't going into New York for shows anymore. Humble Beginnings plays at a couple of them, and gets a fairly decent following. Gabi takes to performing like no other, working the crowd and playing her heart out. It's a nice break from the chaos at home. It gets to the point where Gabi is the most recognizable member of the band.  
  
It's at one of these shows that Gabi first meets Jamia Nestor. Ricky knows her from school and they're talking excitedly when Gabi comes over. (Gabi hadn't really wanted Ricky to come to the shows, but it would be pretty hypocritical of her to tell him he couldn't, since she'd been going to New York for shows at his age.)  
  
"Jamia!" Ricky says to the girl next to him when he sees Gabi. "This is my sister, Gabriela."  
  
"It's Gabi," Gabi says, smiling at the other girl, a petite brunette with a friendly smile.  
  
Jamia grins at her and asks, "You're in Humble Beginnings, right?"  
  
"Yeah, that's right." Gabi nudges Ricky conspiratorially. "Is there something you want to tell me, Ricks?" She waggles her eyebrows suggestively.  
  
Ricky rolls his eyes. "Yeah, right. We're not dating," he says exasperatedly. "We were _actually_ saying that we could organize these shows for you."  
  
Gabi raises her eyebrows. "Really," she says skeptically. "You could."  
  
Jamia purses her lips and raises her eyebrows right back. "You doubt it?"  
  
Gabi decides then that she likes Jamia. "Not as much as I did a second ago," she admits ruefully.  
  
As it turns out, Jamia and Ricky actually really do know what they're doing. The basement shows become more organized and there's more advance notice. It helps all of the bands get noticed more. But with that comes more recognition for Gabi, and Josh becomes increasingly annoyed by that. They have argument after argument about it, to the point where Gabi’s been pushed to the breaking point and ready to break up with him, even though she knows that she’d probably have to leave the band.  
  
Josh ends up loudly breaking up with her after a show. He's drunk, slurring and calling her an attention-grabbing whore who'll spread her legs for anyone who can get her a gig playing music. Rob, who happens to be at that particular show, growls low in his throat and clenches his hands into fists. Gabi holds a hand up to stop him, knowing that Josh will latch onto Rob's eagerness to defend her as proof of her sluttiness. (Rob, though normally amiable and self-deprecating, can be alarmingly fierce when roused and even though Josh is a jackass, she'd rather take care of it herself.)  
  
She finishes her beer, sets the cup down, then hauls back and socks Josh in the jaw as hard as she can.  
  
Already a little unsteady on his feet, that punch is all it takes to knock Josh down. The people who'd been watching this little drama unfold cheer half-heartedly before dispersing to find new entertainment. Gabi shakes her hand out and turns back to Rob.  
  
At practice a few days later, Josh apologizes, a livid purple bruise shining on the curve of his jaw. Gabi accepts graciously, but doesn't offer an apology of her own.  
  
Things only get worse from there. At every show, Gabi acts as normal, hanging over her friends and being cheerfully bitchy to anyone trying to get fresh without even talking to her first. However, any time she actually starts talking to a guy, actually flirting, Josh comes over and interrupts, or stares at her until she's so creeped out that she leaves early.  
  
When she brings it up, Rob laughs and says, "Dude, he's totally pussy-blocking you," but he also offers to 'have a word' with him. Gabi rolls her eyes and says, "Rob, I'm like a foot taller than you. I think I can handle myself."  
  
After about a month of being 'pussy-blocked', she spots Josh flirting with a blonde girl after a show and she grins to herself. She chugs the rest of her drink and saunters over, draping herself over Josh's back and pecking his cheek. "Hey honey, I was looking for you." She blinks naively at the blonde girl. "Hi, I'm Gabi."  
  
The girl stares at her, then throws Josh a dirty look before stalking away. Gabi peels herself from Josh's back and smirks at him before going to find Ricky.  
  
Humble Beginnings stays together past high school graduation, but the tentative truce begins to fray when they go in to record an album. They argue about lyrics, melody; Josh tells Gabi she's an attention-seeking bitch and she calls him a cunt before stalking out of the studio. The whole thing ends with Josh telling Gabi she's out, three weeks after the album is finished.  
  
She flips him off and says, "Fine, fuck you," and drives herself back to her dorm.  
  
She goes to Rutgers because Rob's going there and because they gave her a pretty hefty scholarship. She double majors in poli-sci and philosophy just for the hell of it, and while at times it's difficult, she's interested in the work and that's enough payoff for her. Her roommate is a pretty half-Italian girl named Bianca. Bianca is that rare breed of nice but also wry and funny. They become good friends and they sometimes go out with Rob, who likes ribbing Bianca. Bianca, in turn, loves mocking Rob.  
  
Gabi's first girlfriend, Carla, is actually a friend of Bianca's. Kissing Carla is a lot different from kissing Josh. Carla's softer, less aggressive (and, to be honest, just plain _better_ ).  
  
Carla also makes Gabi learn how to dance. "Gabi," she says, pressing her hands to Gabi's hips, "you have to feel the beat, come on." She presses her lips to Gabi's neck, humming along to the beat of the club's music. "Come on, you're a bassist. You're supposed to be good with rhythm."  
  
Gabi learns.  
  
Carla likes to bite and Josh sometimes makes rude comments if the collar of Gabi's shirt slips aside. (Sometimes, Gabi wonders why she stayed as long as she did. Josh is a douchebag, plain and simple.) Carla, unlike Josh, has no qualms about trying out kinky stuff. A few weeks into their relationship, she handcuffs Gabi to her bed and fucks her with a strap-on.  
  
Dating Carla is much more low-key than Gabi expected. Even their break-up is much less fraught than her relationship with Josh, since they decide just to be friends. Amazingly, they manage to transition well from girlfriends to friends and Gabi keeps in touch with Carla after she drops out to pursue Midtown.  
  
Gabi meets Tyler in her general sciences class (Chemistry, not Biology, because Gabi refuses to dissect animals). They're assigned to be lab partners and Tyler draws little smiley faces on the front page of all of their lab reports. He knows Rob, and the three of them sometimes get together to play. They flow together, and Gabi is more than a little tempted occasionally to quit Humble Beginnings and make a band with Rob and Tyler.  
  
When Gabi's kicked out of Humble Beginnings, he pumps his fist and crows, "Fucking finally!"  
  
She blinks at him in confusion and says, "What the fuck?"  
  
"They didn't deserve you, Gabi," he tells her, very seriously. "They didn't know how good they had it." He slings an arm around her shoulder and tells her, "We're going to make you famous."  
  
  
  
In her first year of college, Gabi briefly decides to try for androgyny. She cuts her hair short and wears loser guy clothes, has people call her Gabe. She gets called a dyke by a lot of people (it doesn't help that she dates girls on occasion), but it's really just an experiment. Her features are just right so that she can pass for a guy, and she often gets mistaken for a boy.  
  
People act differently around her when they don't know she's female. People act with more respect. Other guys complain about their girlfriends around her, calling them bitches (which pisses her off to no end) and their friends join in the complaints. She has never been a hardcore feminist, but the experience makes her consider it.  
  
She quits the whole thing when Rob takes her aside and says, "Dude, we don't care that you're a girl. You're just Gabe, our Gabi. You don't need to prove anything."  
  
"That wasn't the point," she tries to say, but he just punches her shoulder and returns to his drums.  
  
The next day, Gabi returns to her normal t-shirts and tight jeans and decides that she's just going to be herself. She'll never be a pin-up girl, but there's no need for her to pretend to be a boy. (She'll be vaguely jealous of Katy and Vicky-T, who exude femininity from their very pores and does, on one occasion, ask how they do it. Katy shrugs and says that it's just a personality thing. Vicky-T tells Gabi she could try it – wear dresses all the time, wear more make-up – but Vicky-T also says she knows that Gabi would hate it. So that's that.)  
  
In the press, she's still known as Gabe Saporta, her stage name of choice both because she hates the way Gabi looks in print and because she likes to fuck with heteronormality.  
  
(She has a really long conversation with Gerard Way at some party that Mikey organized in which they discuss their experiences as the opposite gender. At the time, Gerard is full of righteous indignation at the way women are objectified. When he, ten years later, marries Lyn-Z, he calls Gabi to say that Lyn-Z exploits that.  
  
Lyn-Z takes the phone from him to tell Gabi that women can't really force men not to see them as sex dolls, so why not turn it to their advantage?  
  
It's an argument that Gabi's heard before, one that she sees the validity of without totally agreeing. She tells Lyn-Z that and Lyn-Z laughs understandingly.  
  
"I get you," she says reassuringly. "Just telling you why I'm comfortable with it."  
  
Gabi thinks Gerard did a good job, marrying Lyn-Z.)  
  
Gabi is never fully comfortable with her femininity. Every time she dresses up for something, she feels uncomfortable and slutty, like she's trying to be something she most certainly is not. She's fine with wearing slightly low cut shirts (v-necks for preference) and tight jeans onstage but that's the maximum sex appeal she'll stoop to.  
  
To her friends, she's Gabi, occasionally Gabe or Gabanti. Ryland is mostly responsible for that last one, she'll admit, but she likes it and it remains unique to Cobra.  
  
Only three people in the world are still allowed to call her Gabriela (her mother, if Gabi still talked to her, would not be one of them): her father, her brother, and William Beckett.  
  
The reason for William being included on that list is something Gabi is still not quite ready to face, even as she approaches thirty.  
  
(Bill calls her Gabriela, but only when they're not in public, and she calls him Bill or Billvy all the time, except when it matters most.)  
Midtown takes off in a way that no one really expects, except maybe Tyler, who's smug as hell about it. Gabi gives her lyrics to the band and they (adding Heath, another friend of Rob's, on drums) write the music together. Gabi loves it, because she feels at home. She can sing her own words; she can be with people she trusts. 

The four of them move into a house on the same street as Thursday; Geoff Rickley lives down the street, as do a number of other bands. Gabi sometimes walks down the street and listens to the bands practice, the music pumping out. 

Living with four boys can be horrifying at times (Gabi doesn't think of herself as particularly neat, but some of the things the guys do are absolutely _disgusting_ ), and Gabi misses being able to talk to Bianca every day (they only get to see each other on weekends; they try to keep in touch, but it's sometimes difficult), but they have more time to work on songs, enough time to pump out an EP. 

She meets Mikey Way at a party a few months after their EP drops. He's a little drunk, just enough that his eyes are drooping. She stumbles into him when a girl shoves past and Gabi spills some of her beer on him. 

"Fuck, I'm sorry," she says, and then she looks at him. He's cute, in a messy way. "Oh, hey. I'm Gabi." 

Mikey smiles slightly. "I know," he says. 

Gabi laughs and leers, "I see my reputation has preceded me." 

Mikey actually chuckles. "Not exactly. I'm a fan of Midtown." He shrugs. "I guess you could say I'm your groupie." 

Gabi looks him up and down and smirks. "Is that so?" 

Mikey fucks her in someone's bedroom, though first he carefully takes his glasses off and sets them aside. It's sloppy and dirty and really, really hot, and when they go back downstairs, Rob won't stop making jokes about them. Gabi flips him off and goes to get another beer. She sees Mikey a few days later and the hickeys still haven't faded from his neck. He grins and presses his fingers to the corner of one of them. 

(When she meets Alicia, many years later, she kind of doesn't know what to say to her. "Oh hey, I fucked your husband back in the day," doesn't seem like an option. 

Luckily, Alicia seems to already know, since she looks Gabi up and down and says, "Damn, I'm sorry I missed that. It must have been hot." 

Mikey nods, looking up from his sidekick. "You have no idea," he confirms.) 

She meets Frank through Mikey, and she likes the kid, even if he is a little crazy. She thinks he and Jamia make a good, if bizarre, couple (though she harbors a little resentment because she had always secretly hoped that Ricky and Jamia would somehow ditch their great platonic relationship for a romantic one. She likes Jamia a lot – if she could pick her sister-in-law, she would've picked her). 

Mikey is perhaps the best PR they could have gotten, because he has this bizarre ability to mobilize the scene. He's a street team all by himself and Gabi suspects that he is largely to thank for their sudden rise in popularity. 

It gets to the point where Stefanie Reins, who Gabi knew in high school, approaches them and offers a record deal with Drive-Thru Records. The four of them sit down and write out their own contracts before they agree, because they've heard enough stories about bands getting dicked to be wary. 

Gabi introduces Drive-Thru to New Found Glory, who has opened for Midtown on occasion, and soon New Found is also getting noticed. When MCA approaches Midtown with the offer of a more wide-spread distribution, they listen. When they eventually accept, they get so much shit about selling out that Rob actually stops checking their email. Of course, this is nothing compared to when they sign to Columbia Records, but at the time it seems unbearable. 

(They end up leaving Drive-Thru after their second album. Things deteriorate between Midtown and Drive-Thru, though. Gabi will admit that this is partially her fault. Drive-Thru spends a lot of its time pushing New Found, and when she confronts Richard about it, he tells her, "Guy-fronted bands are more accessible and easier to sell." 

She posts a searing, angry missive on Midtown's crappy Geocities webpage about misogyny in the music business. When Stefanie calls her to talk about it, Gabi hangs up on her. ) 

With the additional recognition, they get put on better tours. They tour with blink-182, even, and then again on Warped 2001. Gabi gets used the rhythm of touring, gets used to waking up every day in a different place. She gets to see other countries, she gets to see kitschy tourist places in middle America. She sees the insides of at least a hundred different Laundromats and venues. 

The thing with Tyler happens by accident (Gabi wasn't kidding about not dating band members any more) while they're in the van. Or rather, just outside of it, while they're somewhere in Ohio. And by accident – well. 

Tyler is sometimes harder to read than the others, but he touches her more than is perhaps strictly necessary, hand resting on the small of her back or between her shoulder blades. Gabi is self-aware enough to recognize the pull low in her stomach as attraction, but she doesn't want to fuck up a second band, so she ignores the way her stomach twists when he leans in closer than he needs to when he talks to her. 

When it happens, it's late at night and Gabi has been driving. She's exhausted from a week of nonstop shows and she's a little cranky because she used to have nights where she'd eat Jew food and watch horror movies with Ricky. Now she has to make sure she doesn't get too drunk (and that no one doses her drink while she's not looking) while also trying to remember the next place on the list Jamia and Ricky had made for them. She's not sure how she became the default business manager for the band, but sometimes it's really fucking exhausting. 

Everyone except Tyler is asleep in the back. They stop off for gas in the middle of fuck nowhere and Tyler follows her outside. He leans against the van and watches as she grabs the nozzle. She joins him while they wait for the tank to fill, letting her head fall against the van with a sigh. He tweaks the end of one of the curls that escaped from her ponytail and says, "Hey." 

When she turns to look at him, his eyes are unusually serious. They stand like that for a long moment, her curl still pinched between his thumb and forefinger. The heat in Gabi's stomach rises up to crowd in her throat and her breath stalls. Before she can change her mind or remember all the reasons why it's a bad idea, she leans over and presses their lips together. 

For one heart-stopping, stomach-clenching moment, Tyler doesn't react. Then his arm moves to her waist, his hand releasing her curl to gently tilt her head to the side. She moves to press him against the smooth surface of the van and tucks her hands in the waistband of his jeans. They make out like that until the gas pump clicks and Gabi has to go grab the nozzle. 

She can feel Tyler's eyes on her as she replaces the gas nozzle and screws the cap back on. She brushes past him and gets in the driver's side. He gets in a moment later and says, "Gabi." 

When she turns to look at him, he leans over the gear shift to kiss her again, hand curving around her jaw. He pulls back and smiles before leaning his head against the window. 

Gabi clenches her hands around the steering wheel for a moment before turning the key in the ignition. 

They tell the other guys, because they have to, and Heath giggles knowingly, tapping the side of his nose. Gabi rolls her eyes and curls up in the back of the van. She and Tyler really think they're being subtle; apparently they're wrong, because Pete Wentz figures it out the first time he meets them. 

She meets Pete Wentz when they perform in Chicago and when they're finished, this short dude with large, horsey teeth comes up and tells Gabi, "Man, you're one kick-ass chick." 

Gabi looks up and down the short length of his body and replies, "Well, I certainly could kick _your_ ass." 

The guy, rather than getting offended, grins hugely. "You're cool. Hey, I'm Pete Wentz." He holds out his hand. 

She shakes it. "Gabi Saporta." 

"So like I was saying, you guys are pretty damn good," Pete says. "Look, I know touring is hard. If you don't have any other plans, let me take you all out to dinner, on me. I can even give you a place to stay." 

She eyes him warily and says, "Remember, it'll be four against one." 

But actually, it's okay. Tyler doesn't even really touch her, but he leans into her a bit and she leans in as well. Pete notices, because despite his seemingly indifferent façade, he really is an observant guy. He's nice not to mention it in front of the guys (who have already laid down the law of _no sex in the van_ – a law which Gabi and Tyler break only once, thank you very much, and that's when both Rob and Heath have found company for the night), but pulls Gabi aside before they get into the diner. 

"You're dating him?" he asks in a low voice, waggling his eyebrows. 

Gabi shrugs, uncomfortable. "Define dating." 

Pete laughs, short and sharp. "Fair enough." He pulls out a sharpie and grabs her hand. "Hey, so if you're ever in Chicago, give me a ring." He scribbles his number across her hand. "And what's your number?" 

(Gabi will regret giving Pete her number, because sometimes he'll call at three in the morning to tell her how beautiful the stars look or why he can't sleep. At the same time, it's nice to know that he feels like he can call her whenever. 

Over the years, late night calls turn to late night texts, even once he marries and has Bronx. When he reads an interview in which Gabi says, a little self-deprecatingly, she’d like to settle down before she’s forty, he texts her, _dont think gettin married will solve evrthng._

Gabi deletes the message when she reads it and never tells Ashlee about it.) 

Pete talks a lot about the band he's starting with his friend Joe and, "This amazing kid named Patrick, you have to hear him sing," and talks to them about touring and music. He's personable, bizarrely likeable, and they all take to him immediately. They don't realize at the time that having Pete's blessing is like being given the Chicago scene on a silver platter 

It's on their next trip through Chicago that they figure it out, because their show actually sells out. Pete comes up to them afterwards, proud, and says, "Nice show tonight." Then he tugs over a skinny, gangly kid who doesn't look like he's finished growing yet and says, "This is William Beckett." 

William Beckett smiles shyly and says, "Hi." Something in his smile makes Gabi's the thread of desire in her chest coil, hot and lazy. 

(Later, Gabi will say this is one of the defining moments of her life. William agrees, and tells her, "I had a crush on you then." 

"Really?" She props herself up on her elbow, tracing shapes on his bare shoulder, watching his pale skin whiten under the light pressure. 

"Really.” He smiles lopsidedly. “You’re so – you’re just so beautiful and talented and so _confident_ in yourself. I was a weedy kid with glasses.” 

“Don’t put yourself down,” she tells him. “I thought you were cute.”) 

They’re in Chicago for a few days, so Pete invites them to hear his band play the next day. Heath fucks off with some girl, but Rob and Tyler join her to go see them play. To her surprise, William is the opener, just him with a guitar. 

“Hey,” he says into the mic. “I’m William Beckett. This is Remember Maine.” He repositions himself, strums a few opening chords, and begins to sing. 

His voice is good, a little rough at times; but he sings with his whole heart, his eyes closed, and Gabi’s fingers tingle as she watches him lean into the mic. _Seventeen,_ she chants to herself. _Seventeen, he’s only seventeen._

Tyler bumps her shoulder and leans over to whisper, “He’s pretty good.” 

She nods and leans back into him, closing her eyes. His hand tightens on her hip and she doesn’t look up at the stage again until William’s vanished and has been replaced by Pete’s band. 

(She later learns that William is out of his house and living on his own, working at the Gap to support himself while still managing to get straight A's. When she hears this, William quickly goes up on her list of the bravest people she's ever met, which is a very short list that also includes her father and Brendon Urie. 

She brings it up only once, during the Honda Civic Tour. William looks away, seemingly embarrassed. Then he says, "It was more that I was stubborn, rather than brave." 

"You're too fucking modest," Gabi says, shoving at his shoulder lightly. "You're _brave_. I had three other guys helping me out with rent when I pursued music, and by then I'd dropped out of school." 

"You're brave too," he tells her. When she scoffs, he shakes his head. "No, you are, Gabi. How many girls could have done what you did? You made your own way. You never let anyone bring you down." 

"I think you overestimate me," she mutters.) 

Pete's band is somewhat of a ragtag bunch. The lead guitarist has short-cropped hair that's half bleached, the drummer has glasses and long-ish hair, and the singer is short and a little pudgy, and wearing a trucker hat completely unironically. Pete bounds to the front, grabbing the microphone from the singer. He's grinning wildly, his white teeth flashing in the lights. 

“What up, Chicago,” Pete crows into the mic. “We’re Fall Out Boy and we’re gonna rock your fucking socks off!” He turns away and the lead singer opens his mouth, belting out the first line with more power than Gabi expected to come out of such a little guy. 

She ends up moshing, coming out with beer spilled on her t-shirt and an impressive collection of minor injuries. She’s exhilarated, and when Pete finds her after the show, she can tell him honestly that it was awesome. 

(When they eventually tour with Fall Out Boy (and indeed, The Academy Is…, which has formed by that point), every night is like a party, but it serves to strain Gabi and Tyler’s already complicated relationship to the point where they can’t stand to be around each other. It’s on that tour that she meets Travis, whose relaxed attitude toward life calms her somewhat. She ends up spending more time with him and William when she gets sick of her own band. 

She’s smoking up with Travis in the back of the bus while she talks inanely about their album. “I just,” she says, waving the joint. Travis reaches over and takes it from her so that she doesn’t throw it. “It’s just, I poured _everything_ into that record and people don’t _get_ it.” 

“That’s the way people are, Gabe,” Travis says placidly. “You gotta accept it.” 

She sighs and lies back on the floor, staring as the smoke spirals up to the ceiling. “I guess.” 

“You gotta stop being so hard on yourself. Lighten up.” He kicks her foot lightly. “Chill. Things will work out in the end.”) 

 

Once they return from tour after _Living Well_ , Gabi buys a house in Jersey City with the money from the album. She talks a bunch of the day laborers from the house construction site next door into helping her fix it up. She buys them all beers and teaches them poker during their lunch break. They like her a lot because of this, and because she speaks to them in Spanish, so they do a nicer job on her house than on her neighbor’s. 

Tyler visits her when she goes by to make a list of the repairs that it needs and says, “Babe, if you were looking to settle down, you could do a lot better than this.” 

She rolls her eyes. “It’s a fixer-upper, yeah, but I bet you in a few years, this neighborhood will be prime property.” 

Tyler scoffs, but it turns out she’s right. She turns the house over for a hefty profit and buys herself a studio apartment in New York that she doesn’t spend much time in, partially because of touring and partially because the space is too big for her to fill up on her own. 

During that particular break, she and Tyler have sex in every room of that house, and Tyler meets her dad. The two events are not related. 

Tyler is stiff and uncomfortable when he goes to meet Gabi's dad. He's polite, but he's not himself and Gabi's dad looks skeptical. He tells Gabi that he doesn't think Tyler is the one for her. Gabi sighs and tells him that Tyler was acting weird because he was nervous. 

"It's just weird," Tyler tells her afterwards, sitting at the edge of her bed. "I look at him and I just think, 'I've seen your daughter naked.' I don't think that'd be very appropriate dinner conversation, though." 

"I would _kill_ you if you told Dad that," she promises, and she pulls him back into bed. 

What she won't admit, even to herself, is that she agrees with her dad. She loves Tyler, she really does, and she probably always will. But she hates the way she is the one who always has to make the effort. They rarely talk about anything that matters – they've never even talked about what they are to each other, if they're dating or just fucking around. Whenever it seems like the conversation is going in the direction of anything remotely serious, he turns it around to something silly and they end up with their hands in each other's pants. Bianca tells her it isn't healthy; Gabi knows, but she can't make herself stop seeing him. 

Gabi pours out her frustrations and her growing feelings of resentment toward Tyler into a new album. But they end up not having a record company to record with. When they split from Drive-Thru for good, Gabi knows that there'll be backlash. Stefanie accuses her of using them as a stepping-stone. Gabi in turn accuses them of ignoring Midtown because they're a girl-fronted rock band. 

They record _Forget What You Know_ with Butch Walker, but without having an actual label. Tensions run high and by the end of it, Gabi feels like she's been run through a wringer. They're all somewhat relieved that Columbia actually decides to pick up the album, but the resulting backlash from the Jersey scene causes more than a few arguments among the band. 

Gabi and Tyler break up while on tour, in a screaming fight that leaves them not speaking to each other for three days. Later, Tyler comes in and apologizes, saying, "I never knew you wanted more, Gabi." 

"I never made it clear," she acknowledges. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have blamed you for everything. I could talked to you about what I wanted, but I never really tried." 

He gives her a quick hug and says, "I think we'll be better off apart, anyway." 

Things devolve from there, as if Tyler and Gabi's relationship is what was holding the band together. They don't call it a break-up; they use the nice, euphemistic phrase 'hiatus', but they all know what it is. 

Midtown plays its last show in Chicago, and Pete and Joe get flour all over their gear. Heath looks like he’s seriously going to have a fit, but Gabi can’t stop laughing, doubled over and clutching her stomach. William’s there, his hair a little longer, and when they get wasted, Gabi finds herself kissing him, fingers framing his jaw. He lets his hands slide up under her shirt and she pushes into his touch. 

When he offers to take her back to his apartment, she doesn’t say no. 

 

Without the band, Gabi's at loose ends. It's the first time in several years that she doesn't have any purpose. She buys a car and decides to take a road trip, as far as she can get. She makes her way to west and ends up lost in the Arizona desert. She finds a bar in a small town and she stops in to ask for directions and a drink of water, as well as a place to stay. 

To her surprise, one of the young men at the bar recognizes her and says, “Hey, you’re Gabe Saporta. From Midtown.” 

She nods at him and says, “Yeah, that’s right.” 

“Look, if you need a place to stay, I can take you back to the Apache Reservation where I live,” he tells her, smiling. He has a nice smile, and his white teeth stand out against his tanned skin. “I’m David.” He holds out his hand for her to shake. 

“Not a very Indian name,” she remarks dryly. 

He laughs and says, “I go to college, I need to have a white name.” He jerks his head towards the door. “Gonna take me up on my offer?” 

Gabi eyes him warily and turns to the bartender. “Can I trust him?” she asks. The bartender, a woman in her late thirties with dark red hair, leans on her elbows. 

“Davy?” she inquires with a smile. “Sweet boy. Gay as a maypole.” 

David sighs, but his eyes are twinkling. “Thanks. A lot.” 

She ends up going with him anyway, first sending texts to Mikey, Pete, and Rob that says, _following an Apache kid back to his reservation. If you don't hear from me in three days, send help._

But as it turns out, it's fine. David brings her back to his home and his mother stuffs Gabi full of food, wonderful stuff that is really nothing like any other food she's had before. 

When David offers her some peyote, she accepts without really thinking about it and a short while later, she blinks her eyes open to find that she's rather inexplicably in the middle of the desert and a cobra is sitting next to her. 

"What the fuck," she says. 

The cobra's hood wiggles a little. "Gabe," it says. "I have come to deliver an important message." 

"You're talking," she points out, rather needlessly. "You're a _cobra_." 

The cobra hisses irritably. "Yes. Yes I am. Don't you want to know what the message is?" 

Gabi shrugs mentally and decides to go with it. "I guess?" 

"Okay. Here goes." The cobra clears its throat. "Gabe Saporta, I come from a future where cobras are the only living beings following the apocalypse. Your mission: to make the world end in a fucking party." 

"What do you want me to do?" she asks, trying to keep a straight face. 

"I want you to teach hipsters how to dance and tell emo kids to stop being such pussies." The cobra wiggles meaningfully. "You must spread the word of my message to the world. Good luck." He glows briefly and then dematerializes. Gabi looks up to see a spaceship disappearing into the blue sky. She blinks her eyes and finds herself staring at the wall of David's kitchen again. 

David's grandfather is sitting across the table, staring at her hard. David looks shocked, and a little worried. Gabi stretches, cracking her back. 

"What?" she asks them. 

"You have gone on a spirit journey," David's grandfather says, completely serious. "It is unusual that someone not of the People and a woman would have such a vision; but David tells me you are no ordinary woman." 

"Dang right," Gabi says, deciding not to swear. "Um. So that was real?" 

"As real as anything in the spirit world can be," the old man says. He pats Gabi's hand. "You have a path set before you, yes?" Gabi nods, utterly freaked out. "You must go, then. Go, and realize your destiny." 

David walks her out and says, "Listen, Granddad's a little…weird. He takes the whole spirit journey thing really seriously. 

"I noticed," Gabi says dryly. "Do you think he means it?" 

"I'm sure he does." David claps her on the shoulder. "Don't be too worried about it. At least you got a good story out of it." 

"True enough." Gabi shakes her head and says, "Man, a talking _cobra_." She glances at him sidelong and asks, "What did you see?" 

"A wolf that gave birth to a human woman," David tells her. She blinks and he laughs. "Yeah, I don't know either." 

Gabi sets out to return to New York and gives Rob a call, balancing the phone precariously between her ear and her shoulder. "Rob," she says when he picks up, "you'll never guess what happened to me today." 

"You converted to Christianity," Rob says immediately, and then he starts giggling. "No, sorry, what really happened?" 

Gabi grins and tells him. "So I'm going to start a band," she finishes. 

"What are you going to call it?" he asks her. 

She thinks for a moment and then says, "Cobra Starship." 

 

She meets Elisa at a party that Rob throws. Gabi's a little drunk at the time and telling everyone about her mission to send the world out in a party. Elisa grabs her elbow as she staggers and says, "Whoa there." 

"Oh hey," Gabi says, looking her over. "Sorry about that." 

"It's okay. You're Gabi, right? Rob's friend?" Elisa smiles at her. "I'm Elisa." 

"I won't remember that in the morning," Gabi says, waving her finger in Elisa's face. "Hope you haven't formed a bad opinion of me." 

"Not at all," Elisa says. "You know, if you ever need a keyboardist for that band of yours, give me a call." She writes her number on a napkin and sticks it on Gabi's pocket. When she finds it the next morning, it takes a while for her to remember who Elisa is. Once she does, she puts it into her phone to call later. 

That summer, she goes up to a cabin in the Catskills to write. The cabin belongs to one of Heath's cousins, and she's all alone up there. She teaches herself to use Garageband and how to chop lumber, though the former is what really comes in handy. She writes a few songs, most of them silly, but fun. 

(When Ryan Ross hears about the cabin, he gets this speculative look in his eye that bodes only bad news for the rest of his band. When Gabi hears about their 'cabin', she laughs so hard that Bianca – who Gabi visits every time she returns home – thinks Gabi's having a fit. 

"This is your fault," Pete says accusatorially next time he sees her. She holds up her hands in a _who, me?_ fashion. 

"Ross would have done something crazy whether I encouraged him or not," she points out. Pete has to concede that to her.) 

She takes a couple weeks to hang out in the bus with Bill on Warped Tour, mostly because he calls her and says, "You gotta come down her and see this." 

What 'this' turns out to be is Pete and Mikey. They hang off each other like newlyweds. Gabi never actually finds out if they were 'dating', but the one conversation she has with Mikey about it goes like this: 

"So you and Pete," she says, leaning against the side of My Chem's bus. Mikey kicks at the ground and shrugs. 

"Eh," he says eloquently. "It's like he's a light, right, and the rest of us are moths." 

Gabi tilts her head and considers the comment. Mikey's smoking, a habit she suspects he learned from Gerard and Frank. She has to admit that the comparison he made has its validity. She says as much and Mikey snorts. 

"Let's not talk about him," he says a second later, and he changes the subject, asking her about her new band idea. She tells him about her vision in the desert and Mikey, to his credit, doesn't even blink. He just nods and says, "I guess it's meant to be then." 

Talking with Mikey reminds her of what it was like back in Jersey, when she was younger. She goes back to The Academy's bus and writes a song about growing up and growing apart from the people she loved. Bill comes on the bus after his set and watches her write, then asks her if he can see it. 

She hands the sheet of paper to him and lets him read. He puts on his glasses, but still has to hold it close to his face because of the dim light. Gabi tries not to find it endearing, and completely fails. 

He puts it down after a moment and turns to look at her. "Gabi," he says softly, moving closer. "Gabi, this is –" He shakes his head and asks, "Would it be okay if I gave you a hug?" He doesn't wait for her to respond before he grabs her and pulls her over to him, wrapping his arms around her waist. 

She stiffens at first, then slowly relaxes into him. He makes a bony pillow, but they fit together nicely. She kisses his cheek and pulls away. "Thanks," she says quietly. 

William doesn't meet her eyes as he takes off his glasses and moves away. "No problem," he tells her. It’s abruptly becomes awkward and Gabi wonders if maybe he’s remembering waking up the morning after the last Midtown show. The light had spilled over William’s pale, thin body as he slept and Gabi had watched him sleep until he stirred and opened her eyes. She’d leaned over to kiss him before getting up and leaving. Three days later, she'd driven off into the west without a word. She feels guilty about this, but she can't make the words of apology come to her mouth. When she tries, they stick in her throat. 

 

She creates a MySpace for her project and puts up her first little experiment, a riff on a Gwen Stefani song. It gets more hits that she had expected and it gives her the courage to actually go forward with the band. Then she hears about the _Snakes on a Plane_ movie. She writes a little riff and sends the idea to William, who writes a bit more. They pass the song back and forth like that until Gabi flies out to join him on tour. She lies on the floor of his hotel room while Bill talks to Travis on speakerphone, singing out parts with Bill, Travis muttering under his breath. About ten minutes later, Travis emails them a recording of a rap to go over the song, and Gabi's getting pretty psyched about the project. 

She talks to Pete about it and he talks to some other people, and they end up getting on the soundtrack of the movie. Nick Wheeler plays on it, and they get Maja Ivarsson to sing in the chorus too. It comes out startlingly well and the success of the song (and the subsequent video) makes her decide to complete an actual album. 

(The video shoot is honestly one of the best days of her life. Maja is hilariously bitchy about the idea of the video and the two of them gang up on the boys by pulling pranks. Travis goes to open his bag to find it filled with balloons. He laughs and flips them off. William laughs too, until he opens his guitar case and finds it filled with blown-up condoms.) 

This, of course, means that she has to go through the nasty business of actually severing the ties with Midtown. Rob is fine with it; he has his record company with Alex Sarti. Heath and Tyler have found new bands. Gabi is the last holdout. So they officially decide to put the band 'hiatus', all of them knowing full well that it is highly unlikely that they will reunite for any significant period of time. 

Gabi calls in a few favors and records an album's worth of songs. She doesn't have a touring band – she asks Ryland and Alex, a couple of guys who live in Rob's apartment complex, but they have their own commitments. What wins them over is a little blurb in Entertainment Weekly about her and her little 'side-project'. 

Nate Navarro, a tech and former merch boy, hears that she needs a drummer and offers his services. He lives in the basement of her house in Jersey City for a while. Gabi calls up Elisa once she remembers the offer and says, "Hey, do you think you could play keytar?" 

Elisa laughs, a little breathlessly, and says, "Sure, why not?" 

 

Cobra Starship's first tour is a total whirlwind. Ryland and Alex get used to touring pretty quickly, though Nate seems oddly prickly (they eventually figure out it's because they got Armor For Sleep's old bus and he _hates_ it), and Elisa has some difficulty getting settled in. They solve the first problem by getting a new bus, but Elisa sometimes forgets to come to come to sound check and often brings people she meets on the bus. 

When Travis comes up to Gabi and says quietly, “Hey, can you ask Elisa to stop bringin’ her friends on board? It’s kinda freaky, you know.” 

Gabi feels a wave of embarrassment engulf her. “I am so sorry,” she says, feeling acutely aware of how much Travis is doing for them. “I’ve been meaning to have a talk with her, I’ve just been…putting it off.” 

Travis shrugs. “Yeah, no big. I’m just worried, 'cause we don’t know any of those guys.” 

“Yeah, no, I get it,” she assures him. “I’m sorry, I should’ve taken care of it sooner.” 

Travis hunches his shoulders apologetically. "I feel bad even mentioning it. I know it's her first tour and all." 

Gabi feels even worse. She'd been cutting Elisa more slack than she should have for that very reason. "I'll take care of it," she assures him, and she goes to find Elisa. 

When she mentions it, Elisa is appropriately contrite and promises to stop bringing people to the bus – and she does, for about a week. Then she starts up again. 

Things get even worse on Warped. The other band members grow increasingly frustrated with Elisa and make their complaints known to Gabi. Alex gets to the point where he threatens to leave and Gabi agrees that they should have a band meeting about Elisa. 

They come dangerously close to kicking Elisa out, but she immediately breaks down into tears and begs them to reconsider. She falls to her knees and says, "Please, please. I'll do _anything_. I'll – I'll be better, I promise! Put me on probation, with a list of rules, even!" 

Gabi relents, and after conferring with the other members, they agree to give her a probationary period. Elisa even writes out her own list of rules. For a while, things are better. Elisa is on time to sound-check, she stops bringing strangers back to the bus. 

But when things get worse, they get worse in a hurry. She backslides, returning to old habits and old ways. When Gabi confronts her about it on the bus, Elisa is defensive. 

"What?" she demands, crossing her arms. "I'm doing better, aren't I?" 

"You _were_ doing better," Gabi corrects. "Look, I believe in you, Elisa, you've just got to stop missing sound checks and bringing strangers onto the bus, okay?" 

"I'm lonely," Elisa says petulantly. "We're always touring with _your_ friends." 

"You could be friends with them too," Gabi points out. "No one's stopping you from being friendly, Elisa." 

"Just because I'm not a _whore_ like you –" Elisa spits out. Gabi gasps involuntarily and takes a step back. 

"Hey, hey!" cries Ryland from behind her, stepping into the back of the bus. Gabi turns to look at him, feeling a little relieved. Alex and Nate are behind him, clearly having been disturbed by Elisa's shout. "What's going on?" 

"Elisa's being unreasonable," Gabi snaps, letting her temper get the better of her. 

" _I_ am being unreasonable? _You_ 're a stupid, attention-seeking whore!" Elisa screams at Gabi, face going red with rage. "You just want me out so you can have the spotlight all to yourself!" For a moment Gabi doesn't see Elisa yelling at her, but sees Josh and feels her whole body go cold as she realizes that someone she loves has once again come to hate her. 

"I'm going to allow you to pretend you didn't mean that," Gabi says softly. "Because otherwise I will not be responsible for what I do." 

"The hell you will!" Elisa shrieks. "I don't _need_ your pity, you self-righteous bitch. You only got where you are today by sleeping your way to the top. Go _fuck_ yourself! You can't _stand_ having another girl in the band, can you? What do you –" 

"That's enough," Alex says, voice icy in a way that Gabi has never heard before and hopes to never hear again. "Gabe. We can't do this any more." 

Gabi looks at Elisa, clenches her fists, and says, "You're out, Elisa," and stalks back into the bunks. 

 

Victoria Asher is a godsend, a soft-spoken film major who knows Alex and is incredibly beautiful. They meet at a party soon after they return to New York, and Gabi is instantly smitten. She begs Victoria to join the band and after a few weeks, Victoria agrees. 

Victoria settles into the band with no effort at all and the dynamic completely changes. Now instead of one against four, it's the five of them against the world. Victoria is quiet most of the time, but has a wicked sense of humor and a brilliant smile. 

The first tour they go on is Honda Civic, and Gabi almost can't meet Bill's eyes when they run into each other on the first day. Luckily, he's distracted enough not to notice that she's unusually quiet. 

He finally confronts her after a week, cornering her after a show. He points at her and says accusingly, "You've been avoiding me!" 

Gabi actually has to take a step back in the face of Bill's betrayed expression. "I'm not," she lies. She wraps her arms around herself tightly, avoiding his gaze. 

"Yes, you _are_ ," Bill retorts, stepping closer to her. He looks worried and Gabi feels suddenly guilty for putting him through this. "Gabriela, what's wrong?" 

Her resolve crumbles at the sound of her name on his lips and she lets out a shuddery sigh, leaning into him. He cautiously puts an arm around her shoulders as she says, "It's just – when Elisa. She, uh. She said some things. She touched a nerve that I didn't think I had anymore." She laughs self-deprecatingly. "I act like I have thick skin, but I guess I'm not as tough as I'd like to think." 

"You don't have to take on the world, Gabriela," Bill says softly, squeezing her shoulder. "We all believe in you. You're allowed to be human." 

Gabi laughs and says, "Yeah, whatever," and shoves at him. He wanders off after a few more minutes of tour gossip and it takes a few minutes for Gabi's heartbeat to slow back to normal. 

When she goes back to the bus, she scribbles out the chorus for a love song. 

 

She's just fucking around with Garageband when Patrick wanders over onto their bus – "Pete's being a total nightmare," he says, making a face – and he asks if he can take a listen. Gabi hands him the headphones without saying a word. 

Patrick hums and bops his head as he listens. Gabi tries not to look like she's staring at him intently, but she is anxious for his approval. After a few minutes, he puts the headphones down, grinning. He shoves at his glasses and says, "Gabe, this shit is fantastic." 

"Yeah?" she asks, trying to not grin too hard. "You're not just saying that?" 

"Definitely not," Patrick says. "Would it be all right with you if I produced this? We could have some real fun with this stuff." 

"We were thinking of getting an album out soon," Gabi murmurs thoughtfully. "I'll talk to the guys, see what they think." 

Patrick has to reach up to pat her shoulder. "Yeah, you do that," he tells her. "Let me know what you guys decide. Really, I'd be happy to help." 

Of course, the band thinks it's a cool idea and they start writing in earnest. Victoria is the one who first reads _The World Has Its Shine_ and she raises her eyebrows at Gabi. "A love song?" she teases. "Who is it for?" 

"It's for you, darling," Gabi says without looking up from her Macbook. "All of you." 

"Aww," Ryland cooes. "I always knew you cared, Gabe!" 

"And I always will," Gabi promises, turning to face him and fanning at her face dramatically. "You're just so devastatingly attractive, Ryland. How could I resist such a gorgeous face?" 

Alex pretends to swoon and Ryland catches him, dipping him low. Out of the corner of his mouth, he quips, “Frankly my dear, I just don’t give a damn.” 

Alex adopts a really terrible southern accent and replies, “Oh, Ryland!” 

Nate snorts and says, “Dude, never try to be a southern belle ever again.” 

When the tour ends, they go straight to the recording studio with Patrick. They get a loft in New York to stay in for a while, which is where they end up shooting _Guilty Pleasure_. Victoria thinks it's hilarious and sets up the camera while Gabi and Alex choreograph a dance. 

Recording is a breeze and by the end, Gabi's itching to get back on the road. She gives Bill a call and says, "Hey, can we tag along for the rest of your tour?" 

Being on tour with The Academy is always fun and they shoot a few episodes of TAITV with them. After the first shoot, all the bands on the tour play Never Have I Ever on Armor for Sleep's bus. Gabi is tipsy after the first few rounds; she decides to cut the evening short and get back to her own bus. Bill gets up and follows her out into the parking lot. 

"How was recording?" Bill asks, scratching at the back of his head. "Good?" 

Gabi nods and says, "You like the album?" 

"The love song was the best," he says with a grin. Without thinking it through, Gabi leans forward and pecks him lightly on the lips. When she steps back, he's staring at her with a dazed expression. She smiles and pats his chest gently. 

"Good night, William," she murmurs, and departs for her bus. 

 

They tour almost nonstop for a year. She meets Miley Cyrus – and her brother – Pete's newest pet band The Cab, and We The Kings, who are just about the best pranksters Gabi's ever met. They go overseas with Panic at the Disco, they come back for Warped. 

She's seen William a few times since then, but they've carefully skirted the topic of whether there's anything between them. On Warped, though, they're thrown together more and more. Gabi gets off the bus early in the morning and finds Bill waiting for her, drinking coffee while slumped against the tire of a neighboring bus. 

"Hey," he says sleepily, standing up. "How are you?" 

"Tired." She snitches his coffee and takes a sip. "You?" 

"Alive." He makes a vague gesture at the coffee. "You took my coffee." 

Gabi rolls her eyes and hands it back. "You're cute when you're all exhausted and shit." Bill gives her a look, drinking the coffee in one huge gulp. 

"Gee, thanks," he says dryly, arching his eyebrows at her. "What are you doing up so early?" 

Gabi shrugs as casually as she can. "Couldn't sleep." 

Bill suddenly leans forward and kisses the corner of her mouth. "Go back to sleep," he says when he pulls back. "You guys aren't playing for a while." 

She opens her mouth to say something in reply, but Bill's already wandering off through the labyrinth of buses. She sighs and climbs back into the bus. This time, she falls asleep the instant her head hits the pillow. 

 

Gabi meets Katy Perry a few days into the tour, after both of their sets. Katy smiles and says, "Gabe, right? Hi." 

"Hey!" Gabi says, grinning. "I have to say, I like your songs," and then the two of them start shooting the breeze about mutual acquaintances and kissing girls. Travis wanders by eventually and claims Katy, but then Charlotte Sometimes comes over and suddenly it's late and there's an impromptu party going on around them. 

Gabi always forgets what Warped Tour is like until she goes on it again. She takes the beer that a tech thrusts into her hands and wanders through the crowd looking for Bill. 

She finds him talking to Travis Clark, who gives Gabi a high five when she joins them. Bill smiles at her, but gives no indication of anything else, his expression inscrutable. She looks away and tries to ignore the heat radiating off his body. 

Things are like that for a few weeks, until Andrew McMahon comes out on tour. He finds Gabi sitting on the stoop of her bus one afternoon and sits next to her for about fifteen minutes without saying anything, nursing a bottle of diet Dr. Pepper. Finally, he says, "I think you should talk to Bill," and then he stands up. 

Gabi puts it off for a while, talking to Bill only about silly, superficial things like the food or how fucking hot it is, but then he goes and posts the lyrics to a song off the new album on his blog. She doesn't read blogs regularly; she only checks out Pete's when someone tells her there's something interesting on there. 

Pete texts her about it the night it's posted: _dude gabe gotta go chck out bills bolg pst_ , the text says. Gabi sighs and hauls out her Macbook, starting it up and opening the internet. 

The title of the entry is _After the Last Midtown Show_ and at the bottom of the lyrics, Bill's written, _A song about the only girl I’ve ever loved… A nervous night with her after the last midtown show._

"Fuck," Gabi breathes out into the empty bus and she stands, shoving the laptop away from her. She glances out the window of and sees that the festival is still going on. She clambers out of her bunk and goes outside into the parking lot. 

She finds him behind the main stage where Gym Class Heroes is playing and she grabs his arm. "William," she says, and that makes him turn to look at her. "A song about the only girl you've ever loved?" 

Bill stares at her for a moment, then realization dawns on his face. "Gabriela –" 

She leans forward and kisses him as hard as she can. A moment later, he wraps his arms around her waist and pulls her in. His fingers dig into her back and she backs them against the nearest wall. She pulls back to breathe, her arms bracketing his body. "William." 

"It's true, Gabriela, every word." He slides his hands up her back and says again, "Every word." 

 

Warped isn't exactly the best place to be carrying on a new relationship, and there are only two weeks of tour left, so their relationship is relegated to stolen kisses in dark corners and make-out sessions on empty buses. It so happens that they are in such a session when Bill announces his intention of taking Gabi out on a date after tour is over. 

"We need to do this properly," he tells her. "Make it real. I'll take you out to dinner." 

"You know," Gabi says thoughtfully, "I've never really been on a date." 

Bill stares at her in shock, leaning back. "You haven't?" 

"Not a traditional dinner date, no. All the guys I've dated were in bands and the girls – well, we were more casual than that." She shrugs, trying for blasé, but she suddenly feels a little sad. "I never really thought about it." 

"That's it," Bill says firmly. "I'm going to come out to New York and take you out to a real, fancy-ass vegan dinner where you get dressed up and I try to scrounge up enough money to pay." 

"You're a big ass rock star," Gabi teases. "I'm pretty sure you can afford it." 

"Promise me we'll go." He laces their hands together and Gabi looks at their fingers, the contrast between his pale skin and her own dark complexion. 

"Yeah," she says after a moment. "I promise." 

Tour ends and she returns home to New York, planning on not doing much other than sleeping. Bill calls and tells her when he'll be in town, and they pick a date. Gabi finds herself becoming nervous despite knowing it's ridiculous and calls Bianca and Victoria.  
  
They go out to lunch at some hippie café and sit out on the street. They gossip about friends, and Victoria and Gabi tell Bianca about tour. It's about halfway through the meal when Gabi abruptly realizes that she has _girlfriends_ , for really the first time, and she has to fake a cough to hide her laugh.  
  
Victoria announces her plan of sleeping until next tour and Bianca asks, "What about you, Gabi? Any plans?"  
  
"I'm going on a date," she tells them, adjusting her shades as she tilts her head up to the sky. Bianca makes a choked noise.  
  
"You _are_?" she asks, sounding shocked. "With who?"  
  
"Thanks for your support," Gabi says dryly. "And, if you must know, William made me promise to go on a real date with him after Warped was over."  
  
Victoria leans forward, her interest piqued. "Where is he taking you?"  
  
"Some fancy vegan place," Gabi says nonchalantly. There's a silence and she opens her eyes to see Bianca and Victoria exchanging dubious glances. "What?"  
  
"Do you actually have anything to wear?" Victoria asks doubtfully. Gabi opens her mouth and Victoria quickly clarifies, "Anything _nice_?"  
  
Gabi frowns and mentally reviews her closet. After a moment, she admits, "Most things I own are for tour. Jeans, t-shirts."  
  
Bianca shakes her head in mock despair, grinning. She stands and says, "Come on, we're gonna find you something to wear so that you don't get kicked out."  
  
Gabi rolls her eyes but allows Bianca to pull her out of her seat and down the street. Victoria chuckles and follows after them, flicking her sunglasses down.  
  
Bianca takes them to her workplace and locates a rack of black evening dresses. She has Gabi try on all kinds of dresses and Gabi doesn't actually see the difference between most of them. It's black, it's strappy – what does it matter what the fabric is or how the hem is stitched?  
  
But Bianca and Victoria are adamant that these are important differences and stuff Gabi into at least five other dresses. "This," Gabi says as Bianca fiddles with the zipper on the back of the latest dress, "is why I don't have female friends."  
  
"Because they'll force you to try on clothes?" Victoria asks sarcastically. "Honestly, Gabe, being crazy about clothes is not necessarily a woman's domain."  
  
"Exactly!" Bianca chimes in, grabbing Gabi's shoulders and whirling her around. "I can name at least twenty men off the top of my head who are totally obsessed with fashion and would be even more fascist about this operation than we are." She pauses and looks at Gabi. "Damn. Who knew? You clean up nice."  
  
Gabi resists the urge to punch Bianca's shoulder and looks over at Victoria, who smiles and nods. "Looking good."  
  
Gabi looks over at the full-length mirror and is surprised to see that she looks completely different out of her usual clothes. "This is weird," she says, smoothing at the material over her thighs. The dress clears her knees by about four inches and has a low back. "Are you sure it's not too short?"  
  
"You have long legs, it's okay," Bianca says absently, rummaging in one of the cupboards against the wall. "Heels?"  
  
"As short as possible, if necessary," Gabi tells her, a little worried. "You haven't seen me attempt to walk in heels."  
  
"Probably don't want to either," Victoria quips, hoisting herself up onto a nearby table. She swings her legs and tilts her head to the side. "You should put your hair up."  
  
Gabi tugs at the end of her ponytail and makes a face. "It's so much trouble, though."  
  
"I'll do it," Bianca volunteers, crawling back out with a pair of black pumps dangling from her fingers. "Won't take more than five minutes. Here, try these on."  
  
Gabi takes them from her and slips them on, then straightens up. Luckily, the heels are relatively thick and short, so she doesn't wobble as she takes a hesitant step forward. She makes a face at her reflection. "God, this is going to be awkward."  
  
"Oh, hey now." Victoria slips off the table and pads toward her. "You like William a lot. He likes you a lot. It's been like this for a long time. You have nothing to worry about, Gabe."  
  
Gabi takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. "I know," she says. "But that doesn't mean that I'm not nervous."  
  
  
  
Gabi nervously tugs at the hem of her dress, feeling oddly exposed. William looks up from the table and catches sight of her. His eyes widen and he stands, the corner of his mouth turning up wryly. He's neatly dressed in a suit with a thin tie; she itches to tug him towards her.  
  
"You look beautiful," he tells her sincerely, pulling the chair out for her. She sits and smoothes the fabric of her dress.  
  
"I still feel like a cougar," she says dryly. "I'm six years older than you, William."  
  
"And yet this is your first real date," he points out serenely, sitting down. "Where did you get the dress?"  
  
She laughs. "Bianca found it for me. This is probably the first time I've worn a dress since…" She pauses and actually has to think about it for a moment. "Probably since the _Snakes_ Premiere and that wasn't really a fancy dress. You like it?"  
  
"Yes," William replies, and when she meets his gaze, William's eyes are darker than usual. She licks her lips and knows that she's just as obvious. She takes the wine list from the waiter and opens it up, feeling William's eyes on her as she bends her head to read in the dim light.  
  
Somehow, they make it through the entire meal, though Gabi couldn't tell someone what she'd eaten. They sit a careful decorous six inches apart in the cab, but the moment they're in the elevator, going up to her apartment, she grabs Bill by his tie and pulls him in.  
  
"Gabriela," he says softly, one hand cupping the base of her head. Their lips aren't quite touching, but she can feel his breath fanning out over her lips. She closes her eyes and leans in, grabbing a handful of his shirt. The elevator doors ding open and they stumble out until they collapse against the door. Gabi finds her key and unlocks the door to her apartment, slamming the door behind them. Bill pushes her back into the bedroom and steps back to allow her to breathe.  
  
She tugs at the hairpins keeping her hair in place and her curls tumble down, falling just past her shoulders. Bill runs his hand through the thick locks and says in a rough voice, "This is the longest I've seen your hair."  
  
"It's too long," Gabi says, softly.  
  
"I like it," Bill replies, and he kisses her again. She slowly works his tie off and slides the jacket from his thin shoulders, pushing him back onto the bed. He slides his hands across the bare skin of her shoulders and she shivers, eyelids lowering. He pulls her closer and pushes up the hem of the dress, thumbs caressing the crease at the top of her thighs. She shivers and thumps at his chest lightly.  
  
"Maybe," she whispers roughly, "maybe we should move to the bed?"  
  
"Good idea," he gasps, and lets her push him back onto the mattress. She straddles him, her dress rucking up as she leans forward to unbutton his shirt and slide it off. He rests his hands on her thighs, watching her without saying a word.  
  
Feeling unusually shy, she pulls the dress off over her head and throws it to the side. William grins and slides his hands up to her ribs. He tugs her back down, fingers slipping just under the bottom edge of her bra. "Gabriela," he murmurs in her ear and he rolls them over. He slides down and gently tugs her panties down her legs. She looks down at him and he meets her eyes for a moment, grinning slightly before he lowers his head between her legs.  
  
The first touch of his mouth sends her scrabbling for grip, and she ends up with one hand tangled in his hair, the other knotted in the sheets of her bed. It's been a while since she's had sex – the last time had been with William, on tour. She realizes, abruptly, that she hasn't slept with anyone else since she kissed him.  
  
Her thoughts are interrupted by William's finger slipping inside her. He crooks his finger and she tries to arch up, only to be stopped by him pressing down on her hips. Her thoughts scatter as he pushes his tongue further inside and she's already ridiculously turned-on, so she comes before she's really had a chance to enjoy it.  
  
William laughs, lifting his head. "And girls make fun of guys coming fast," he teases. His mouth is wet.  
  
Gabi stares at his mouth for a long moment before croaking, "I guess you're just that much of a stud." She reaches up to undo her bra and says, "Now get those pants off and fuck me already."  
  
William's eyes flash dark again and he yanks off his neatly ironed pants. He lowers himself to her and kisses her again, letting Gabi taste herself. It's weird, as usual, but strangely hot and Gabi pushes him over so that she can ride him.  
  
"Condom?" he asks, eyes wide. Gabi curses and lunges for the bedside table, yanking open the drawer and pulling out the (relatively full) box of condoms. "What, you don't have any?" she asks as she slides condom over his cock. He shivers and grabs at her shoulders.  
  
"I don't have a ready supply," he admits shyly. "I don't really sleep with many people."  
  
"Good," she says possessively and fucks herself down onto him.  
  
It's been a while since the last time she slept with William, and what she forgot is how _intense_ he is. All that energy, all that _passion_ that he funnels into performing, into writing, into singing…it's all channeled into the moment. It's slightly unnerving to have that much of his attention fixed on her, but Gabi's a performer; so she arches her back and tosses her hair. William grips her hips, his eyes locked on her face. She lowers down to kiss him and cups her hands underneath his neck, spreading her fingers through his hair.  
  
William bites her lower lip gently and slides his hand over her belly, down to her clit. She gasps into his mouth and comes when he thumbs at her clit, shuddering around his cock. William rolls them over a moment later and thrusts into her a few more times before coming inside her. He collapses on top of her and she shoves at him gently.  
  
"Get off me, you fatass," she murmurs. He rolls off her and presses his face into her shoulder.  
  
"Who you calling a fatass?" he demands sleepily, biting at the place where her neck met her shoulder. Gabi grins and lets herself drift off to sleep.  


  
Gabi wakes up when the weak morning sunlight hits her face. She sits up and rubs at her eyes with one hand. Next to her, William makes a noise and rolls to his side, one hand smacking Gabi's bared hip. Gabi reaches down and laces their fingers together. A look at the clock tells her it's only seven in the morning. She wraps herself in the sheet and climbs out of bed to shut the curtains before curling up next to William. She kisses his shoulder gently and drifts back into sleep, neatly fitting into his embrace.  
  
When she wakes for a second time, William is already up, wearing his glasses, and reading one of the books from her bedside table. She crawls up and kisses him, morning-breath and all. "Good morning," she whispers when she pulls back, a smile tugging at her lips.  
  
He puts the book down and pulls her back, kissing her soft and slow. "Mm," he murmurs. "What do you say we go get some brunch?"  
  
"Sounds good," she purrs, sliding out of bed. "I'll get dressed."  
  
"Shower first," William says firmly, following her. He has the blanket wrapped around his waist, to her amusement.  
  
She rolls her eyes at the mention of a shower, but allows him to propel her into the bathroom. She pulls him in after her and kisses him as he clutches at the slick tiles on the wall with one hand and cradles her head with the other. He washes her hair in thanks, and they kiss under the hot spray for at least ten minutes before William pulls back and reminds her, " _Food_."  
  
They walk a block to Gabi's favorite vegan diner, hands linked. The diner owner, a middle-aged Guatemalan woman who absolutely adores Gabi, greets them with, "Gabriela, ¿quién es este chico guapo?" [#] Gabriela, who is this handsome boy?  
  
"Hola, María," Gabi says with a smile. "Este es William." [#] Hello, Maria. This is William.  
  
"Es bueno conocerla," William tells Maria with an incredibly heavy accent. Gabi looks at him in surprise and he winks at her.  
  
Maria beams and tells Gabi, "Él es un buen chico." [#] He is a good boy.  
  
"Sí, lo sé," Gabi replies, smiling at William. He smiles back at her, obviously uncomprehending.  
  
They eat mostly in a comfortable silence, occasionally meeting each other's eyes and then grinning goofily. Towards the end of the meal, Gabi slips her foot up William's calf and catches his eye. His eyes darken and they hurry to pay the bill and get back to her apartment, where they fall back into bed.  
  
They only had a week before William had to go off on his next tour and they spend most of it lounging around her apartment watching television and having sex. Gabi goes with him to the airport and sees him off. They don't kiss, not in public, but she holds his hand and squeezes it hard before slipping a note into his bag. All it says is three little words, with her initials at the bottom.  
  
She goes on her own tour about half a week later and is grateful for the distraction. Victoria asks her how the date went, and all Gabi says is, "Good."  
  
Victoria gives her a look but doesn't say anything else.  
  
  
  
Gabi develops a cold of sorts in the middle of the tour and immediately starts dosing herself with cold medication and throat lozenges. Ryland threatens to strap her down and force her to sleep if she doesn't sleep herself.  
  
She loses her voice a week later.  
  
She wakes up early because Victoria's up, humming quietly as she putters around the bus. Gabi opens the curtains to her bus and peeks out. Victoria sees her and smiles, waggling her fingers in greeting. Gabi opens her mouth to say hello, but the word comes out mangled. Her throat shrieks with pain and she mouths, 'Ow!'  
  
"What's up?" Victoria asks, frowning. Gabi gestures at her throat frantically. Victoria's eyes widen. "You've lost your voice?"  
  
Gabi nods emphatically and Victoria reaches for her phone. "Okay, I'll call Tony," she says, scrolling through the contacts. "We'll cancel tonight's show."  
  
Gabi frowns and waves her hands, trying to convey her dislike for that proposition. Victoria shakes her head and covers the mouthpiece of the phone. "I know you don't want to cancel shows, but you can't _talk_." Gabi tries to protest, but remembers that she can't speak a moment too late. "See?"  
  
"I think we should get a doctor," Alex puts in from his bunk, sticking his head out of the curtains. "Or take her to a clinic or something."  
  
Gabi attempts to convey her utter distaste for _this_ suggestion with just her eyebrows, but she just ends up making Alex convulse with laughter. She gives him the finger and drags herself out of bed so someone can take her to the doctor.  
  
Ryland borrows a car from a friend of his who lives nearby and takes her to the nearest clinic. He decides to frustrate her by playing the classic rock station and singing along at the top of his lungs. Gabi glares at him, her fingers itching with the need to join in.  
  
She browses trashy celebrity magazines after filling out the required forms, finding several photos of Pete and Ashlee scattered throughout. Ryland cranes his neck to read over her shoulder and snorts at the sensationalist captions.  
  
"Making fun of Pete's fashion sense again? Please, so overplayed, am I right?" He nudged her with his shoulder and laughs. Gabi closes the magazine, the glossy faces smiling vapidly up at her. She makes a face and hums a bar of _Smile._ Ryland picks it up and beats out the rhythm on his seat. A young mother holding an infant glares at them and shushes her baby, who'd started to cry listlessly.  
  
It's still pretty early in the morning; the clinic is only about half-full. Gabi looks around, seeing mostly mothers and children, a few teenagers, one girl who is very pregnant, and a man who's fallen asleep against the wall, snoring faintly in time to the song that is playing over the PA system. Gabi tugs her hood up and kicks her feet onto the chair across from her, settling in for a long wait.  
  
They've been waiting for half an hour when a male nurse in light green scrubs comes out, consults his clipboard, and calls, "Gabe Saporta?"  
  
Ryland slaps Gabi on the back. "Go get 'em, tiger."  
  
Gabi gestures at him and he stares at her for a moment. Abruptly, his eyes alight with understanding. "Ah, you need me to talk for you. Of course, my dear." He stands and bows elaborately. "After you, fearless leader."  
  
Gabi whacks him on the back of the head and nods at the nurse. He herds them through the narrow hall, the walls papered with cream and navy blue pinstripe wallpaper. It's almost identical in every way to the clinics Gabi's mom used to take them to, back before they had the money to afford real doctors.  
  
"Wait in here," the nurse says brusquely, showing them into an exam room. "A doctor will be in to see you soon."  
  
Gabi hops onto the exam table and fidgets with the sleeves of her jacket while Ryland picks up an old issue of Cosmo. He catches her look and says dryly, "I read it for the articles."  
  
Gabi snorts and kicks her feet idly. The door opens a minute later and a harried-looking young doctor with thick dark hair and wire-rimmed glasses comes in, reading the paperwork Gabi had filled out in the waiting room.  
  
"Gabriela Saporta, twenty-nine years old. You lost your voice?" He has a slight accent; maybe Indian, Gabi thinks. He looks up and laughs awkwardly. "Sorry, guess you can't answer me." He looks at Ryland. "Are you the boyfriend?"  
  
Ryland chokes. " _No_. God. Uh, we’re bandmates."  
  
"Sorry." The doctor smiles, relaxing a little. "I'm Dr. Khalsa. She lost her voice?"  
  
"She indicated that it hurt," Ryland says primly, a little Guy Ripley slipping into his voice. Dr. Khalsa gives him a weird look, but nods. He reaches above the sink into the cabinet and pulls out a small spray bottle.  
  
"This will numb your throat. Open up," he orders Gabi and she opens her mouth obediently. He sprays the mediation into her mouth and sets it down.  
  
It tastes _awful_ , some sort of artificial cherry flavor. Gabi makes a face and cautiously tries to speak. "That's disgusting," she croaks and she smiles when it doesn't hurt.  
  
"But it does the trick," Dr. Khalsa says absently, scribbling on his pad. "I’m gonna give you a prescription for that. It’ll help a little. Let me take a look.” He reaches into the jar of tongue depressors and orders her to open up. Gabi makes a face at the taste of the wood and rolls her eyes at Ryland while Dr. Khalsa shines his light down her throat.  
  
He steps back after a moment and starts scribbling again, muttering under his breath. “It’s bad, isn’t it?” Gabi asks hoarsely. “Is it going to be permanent?”  
  
Dr. Khalsa looks up, startled. “No, no. It shouldn’t be, if you’re careful. I think you’ve got a cyst, so you’re going to have to check in with a doctor at home. Until then, you’re gonna have to take it easy. Don’t speak if you don’t have to.”  
  
“We’re on tour,” Gabi says, a feeling of horror rising inside her. “We can’t just cancel all our dates!”  
  
"I understand, but you really need to rest your voice," Dr. Khalsa says, scribbling on a pad. "Please try not to talk more than you have to. Drink tea and honey. You're probably going to need surgery later on."  
  
"Great," Gabi whisper-mutters. "Thanks."  
  
"If you're not careful, you could permanently damage your vocal chords," he warns. "I _would_ recommend that you cut your tour short, but I'm guessing that you won't do that."  
  
“ _No_ ,” Gabi says emphatically. “They’re counting on us.”  
  
Dr. Khalsa shrugs. “Then I just recommend that you take it easy. If it gets worse, see another doctor. You remember Julie Andrews?” He shakes his head sadly. “Damn shame.”  
  
“Fuck,” Gabi says.  
  
  
  
On the way back from the clinic, Ryland stops by a Staples and picks up a small whiteboard and several dry-erase markers. He sets the bag on Gabi’s lap and says dryly, “Happy birthday.”  
  
Gabi opens the package and writes in purple dry-erase marker, _YOU’RE AN ASSHOLE JUST SO YOU KNOW._  
  
Ryland glances over and grins. “Quite right,” he agrees, starting the car.  
  
Alex nearly pisses himself laughing when he sees the board and Gabi writes, _YOU’RE NO LONGER MY FAVORITE._  
  
“I’m sorry,” he says disingenuously, grinning widely. “Would you like me to cook you something to make you feel better?”  
  
She scowls at him and writes, _YOU AND RYLAND WERE MEANT FOR EACH OTHER._  
  
They end up having to cancel that night’s show, which totally sucks. Gabi feels so guilty about it that she logs on to the MySpace account and explains what happened to everyone. She’s somewhat gratified by the responses, the majority of which theme around, “We don’t care, as long as you’re okay!” and “Get well soon!”  
  
Within five hours of posting, Gabi receives texts from both Pete and William. The first reads, _gabe b crfl gt well soon – petey_ and the second says, _Are you okay?_  
  
She texts him back to say, _don't worry I'll be ok._  
  
She makes it through the tour, but her voice is failing her by the time they get back to New York. She goes to her doctor and explains the problem in her hoarse voice. Dr. Mendez makes her lie down and ultrasounds her throat, humming quietly.  
  
"Mmmm," Dr. Mendez says thoughtfully. "You've definitely got a mass on your vocals cords. Small. Probably a cyst." She removes the paddle and hands Gabi a tissue so she can wipe the gel off her neck. "While we remove it, I think we'll take a biopsy. I'm sure there's nothing to worry about, but it's just to be on the safe side."  
  
"Biopsy?" Gabi asks faintly, dropping her hand. "Just to be safe?"  
  
"Just to be safe." Dr. Mendez pulls out Gabi's chart and starts writing. "I'll call you. Do you have any preferences for hospitals?"  
  
Gabi lists off the name of the local Jewish hospital and signs off on some paperwork. She takes a train out to Jersey to see her dad. He makes some paella for her and sits across from her.  
  
"What is going on, Gabriela?" he asks, propping his head on his hand. Gabi picks at her food and bites her lip.  
  
"I'm seeing someone," she tells him, not daring to look up. When he doesn't reply, she chances a glance to see that he's smiling.  
  
"I'm glad for you," he says sincerely. "What is their name?"  
  
"William." Gabi sets her fork down. "I'm hoping that you'll be able to meet him soon."  
  
"Ah, he is that boy that you have worked with before?" Diego nods thoughtfully. "He seems like he is a nice young man. Quite a bit younger than you, yes?"  
  
Gabi rolls her eyes and Diego chuckles raspily. "Yes, Dad, he is," she answers. She pauses for a moment and just looks at him. His hair is quite liberally streaked with white now, the lines around his mouth sad, but the crows' feet at his eyes reveal his happiness. "You? Are you okay?"  
  
"I'm doing just fine, Gabriela," he says dismissively, waving his hand. "You, you lost your voice. Tell me what happened."  
  
Reluctantly, Gabi tells him what the doctor had said and by the end he is frowning thoughtfully, his 'doctor face' on. "I am sure Dr. Mendez is correct in saying that you likely have nothing to worry about," he says after a moment. "And as long as you have a good surgeon, there is no reason that this surgery should affect your singing at all." Still, his expression is concerned.  
  
Gabi smiles at him and takes his hand. "Don't worry about me, Dad," she says softly. "I'll be all right."  
  
"I want you to be happy," Diego replies. "And this, this music, it makes you happy." He squeezes her hand and then releases it. "Do what you have to."  
  
  
  
Bianca accompanies Gabi to register at the hospital. The doctor takes the file and reads it closely before sitting across from her.  
  
"I'm Doctor Gat," she tells Gabi. "I'll be the lead on your operation. It's fairly noninvasive surgery. Kind of like getting your tonsils removed. We shouldn't have to cut into your throat."  
  
"Shouldn't have to?" Gabi asks.  
  
"We'll use an endoscope to get to it," Dr. Gat explains. "We'll keep you here for a few days or so afterwards so we can run a few tests, make sure everything is okay." She tucks a blonde curl of hair behind her ear and smiles. "Any questions?"  
  
They put her under for the surgery, so when she wakes up she's in her room. A nurse comes in a moment later and asks, "How are you feeling?"  
  
"Feeling fine, actually. Thanks." Her voice is a little raspy, but she feels great and it doesn't hurt to talk. Gabi pushes herself up and sees that there are flowers everywhere. "Wow."  
  
The nurse grins. "Yes, quite a few of your friends came by." She leans in confidentially and says, "A cute young man was here for you, but he went to get lunch. He said he'll be back in an hour."  
  
"What was his name?" Gabi asks.  
  
"William." The nurse sees Gabi's expression and smiles. "Ah, so it's good that he's coming back."  
  
"Yeah," Gabi agrees. The nurse gives Gabi her messages and asks her what she'd like to eat before letting Gabi have her privacy. Gabi calls her dad first, then texts Pete to let him know everything was fine. He sends her a text back with only a smiley face.  
  
She is eating soy yogurt and watching _Days of Our Lives_ when William comes in. She pats the bed next to her and he sits on the edge of the mattress. He laces their fingers together and asks, "How are you?"  
  
"Doing better," she assures him in a whisper. "Dad told me he's taking Ricky and me to Uruguay for Hanukkah."  
  
"You think you could come to Chicago first?" William asks, almost shyly. "I want you to meet my brother and sister."  
  
Gabi looks up at him, surprised. "Really?"  
  
(Gabi knows full well that Courtney Beckett is the person that she has to impress if she wants her relationship with William to go well. William clearly worships his sister and she just as clearly adores him. Courtney shakes Gabi’s hand, examining her face closely. Gabi feels unreasonably nervous, like she’s taking an exam she hadn’t prepared for. She must pass, though, because Courtney releases her hand and says, “I’ve heard a lot about you.”  
  
  
“I hope some of it was good,” Gabi quips, and Courtney giggles.  
  
“Some of it,” she agrees, casting a glance at her brother, who tugs at the end of Gabi’s ponytail before introducing her to his parents.)  
  
In answer, he leans down to kiss her, his free hand sliding up into her hair. She kisses back as much as she can and when he slides back, he squeezes her fingers gently.  
  
She's released from the hospital a day later, the tests having come up negative for cancer. William's still in town, so she makes him go down to Jersey with her so they can have dinner with Diego. Ricky shows up too and they talk about music, trading gossip about mutual acquaintances. Diego doesn't say much during the meal, just listens to them talk, a thoughtful expression on his face.  
  
After dinner, Ricky and Bill disappear upstairs to rummage through Ricky's record collection and Gabi helps her dad clean up. They settle into the comfortable old pattern of rinse, dry, dishwasher, Diego passing the plates to Gabi after he rinses them off. After a minute, Diego says, "William seems like a nice boy."  
  
Gabi nods, lifting a wet hand to tuck a wayward curl back behind her ear. "He is."  
  
"He loves you," Diego observes a moment later, handing Gabi the last plate. The plate almost slips out of her hands and she catches it just in time, gently placing on the bottom drawer of the dishwasher. He smiles and says, "You think I would not notice, Gabriela?"  
  
"I didn't know," Gabi replies softly, numbly drying her hands on the dishtowel he holds out. There are blue ducks patterned along the bottom; she thinks they're probably new."I have to –" She breaks off and shakes her head. "Never mind."  
  
Diego shoves at her shoulder gently. "Go. I don't mind."  
  
Gabi nods and goes upstairs, following the soft sound of Simon and Garfunkel down the hall to Ricky’s room. She pushes the door open gently and finds William and Ricky sitting on the hardwood floor, eyes closed. She steps in quietly and sits down next to William. He cracks his eyes open and smiles at her, reaching out to twine their fingers together.  
  
They stay the night in Gabi’s old bedroom, curled up close to keep from falling off the tiny twin bed. The next morning, William gets up and starts rooting through his bag to try and find some clean clothes. As he yanks out a t-shirt, the note Gabi had shoved into his bag two months before tumbles out to the floor and he bends to pick it up, a confused look on his face. “What’s this?” he mutters, pinching the edge between two fingers.  
  
Gabi sits up in bed and watches as he reads the short sentence. His expression changes and he turns his head to stare at her. “Gabriela,” he says quietly. “When did you put this in?”  
  
“Before you left for tour.” She crosses her arms nervously. William drops the note on top of his bag and climbs back onto the bed, bracing himself above her.  
  
“Me too,” he tells her, smiling softly and she unfolds her arms so she can pull him down to her.  
  
  
  
When it happens, she's not expecting it at all. She knows full well that a lot of people have had their hypotheses about her and William, and a select number of people know the truth. Her band knows, his band knows, Pete knows – and by extension most of Decaydance knows. Andrew McMahon knows because he saw them together at Warped, but as far as Gabi ever knows, he keeps his mouth shut. (He actually is one of William's groomsmen. William has his sister stand in as best man. Though Gabi tries her best, Ricky refuses point blank to be "man of honor" and instead calls himself "the other best man.") It's not something anyone talks about. It's an open secret, but Gabi and Bill both try to keep their personal lives private and out of public eye.  
  
So it's a bit of a surprise when a picture from Gabi's trip to Chicago surfaces on Perez Hilton's blog.  
  
"What does it say?" she asks Bill over the crackly sound of an international call.  
  
"'Spotted!! Cobra Starship frontwoman Gabe Saporta and The Academy Is… singer William Beckett seen canoodling in Hyde Park!! I wonder if Pete Wentz knows that his employees are in an office relationship????'" Bill somehow manages to convey the extra punctuation clearly. He pauses. "Why are you a frontwoman and I'm just the singer?"  
  
"Because I'm the better half." She walks to the window of her grandmother's house, where there's better reception. "I just hope nobody spots the ring."  
  
("It seems kind a lame to call this a promise ring," William remarks, sliding the band on to Gabi's left ring finger. "But it also seems a little soon to get engaged."  
  
"You've had a crush on me since you were seventeen," Gabi points out, not entirely unreasonably.  
  
He grins goofily and kisses the corner of her mouth. "And you're getting on in years," he teases.  
  
"Just because you're so boyish and young," Gabi sniffs, pinching his side. He yelps and jerks away from her. "I'll show you," she promises him and he grins.  
  
"Come and get me, old lady," he taunts and she lunges for him, tackling him into the snow.)  
  
"Too late," William says mournfully. "'Just noticed – Gabe is wearing a ring!! Could the lovebirds be getting married?? Neither one can be reached for comment at the moment – but we'll keep you posted!'"  
  
"Can we have Pete kill him?" growls Gabi, clenching the phone.  
  
"Only if I can help." William sighs heavily. "And _this_ is why I like to keep my personal life _private_."  
  
“I’m gonna talk to Pete,” Gabi says after a moment. “I’ll let you know what he said.”  
  
Pete’s advice is, somewhat predictably, to not say anything for the time being. “Let me talk to Perez,” he tells Gabi. In the background, she can hear Bronx crying and Ashlee singing quietly. “I’ll see if he can just lay off for the time being. It’s really up to you.”  
  
“Okay,” she says and she hangs up after a little bit of small talk. Diego looks up from reading the newspaper.  
  
“Everything okay?” he asks, his voice concerned.  
  
“It will be,” Gabi answers decisively.  
  
  
  
When she returns to America, she gets together with the band and they decided to start writing. She takes a leaf out of her own book and gets a cabin (Ryan tries to accuse her of stealing their idea, but she points out that _he_ actually stole it from her to begin with, so she was really just reclaiming the idea.) so they can write and have fun. The CobraCam is actually Nate’s idea, which is weird for a lot of reasons, but they have fun with it.  
  
Pete calls her up later in the year and asks if they want to come out on tour with them. She consults the others and they decide to go along for the ride. Pete gives Gabi a huge hug when they arrive at the first stop and says, “Gabe, you gotta meet Bronx, you haven’t met my baby yet.”  
  
Ashlee is back on the bus, singing to Bronx, who is the sweetest child Gabi has ever seen. Ashlee smiles when Gabi comes in and asks, “You want to hold him?”  
  
They pass Bronx from one band member to the other. Bronx seems fascinated by Ryland, staring wide-eyed at him while Ryland pulls faces. Gabi sits down next to Ashlee and says, “He has your eyes.”  
  
Ashlee laughs and says, “Yeah, I guess that’s true.” She smiles fondly and pats Gabi’s back. “You ever think about it? Settling down and having kids?”  
  
“More often than you’d think,” Gabi admits.  
  
She calls William that night and tells him about it. He’s quiet for a long time and then he asks, “You wanna get married?”  
  
She freezes, a rushing noise rising in her ears. Then she recovers herself and says, “You’re seriously proposing to me over the phone?”  
  
William laughs and says, “Yeah, I guess I am.”  
  
Gabi thinks about it for a moment and then announces, “Fuck it. Why not?”  
  
  
  
They don’t tell anyone at first, but Gabi comes up with an idea that would make Pete laugh. She calls William and asks him and he is reluctant at first, but then he says, “Sure.”  
  
Three hours before her show starts, she calls him again. "Are you okay with this?" she asks him, huddled in the back of her bus, clutching her phone to her ear.  
  
Bill lets out a breath. "I guess I have to be." He laughs and adds, “It’ll be fun.”  
  
  
  
"There's been speculation," Gabi says, looking out over the sea of people, "that I am dating William Beckett." The crowd titters, but they don't look away; Gabi can feel the weight of their eyes on her. Gabi grins at them. "I'm sorry, ladies and gents, but as of three days ago, William Beckett is officially engaged."  
  
The crowd shrieks and Gabi counts them off into "The World Has Its Shine." She knows that somewhere, almost simultaneously, Bill is announcing the same news before playing "After the Last Midtown Show." (A day later, Gabi runs into a YouTube video mash-up of footage from the two shows on Perez Hilton's blog. Underneath, he's written, 'AWWWWWWW'.)  
  
Ryland and Alex jump on her the moment they get off stage and lift her into the air, shouting. Pete joins them, though he’s kinda too short to help them carry her. It’s total chaos backstage, everyone shouting congratulations and asking why she hadn’t said anything.  
  
“I wanted it to be a surprise,” she says, over and over again. Victoria and Cassadee both give her huge hugs once Ryland and Alex set her down. Nate is excited in his own laconic way, wrapping an arm around her waist and squeezing. Finally, Patrick waves his hands and says, “We have to go on stage, let her go back and call her fiancé already,” and everyone bursts into fresh hoots and catcalls.  
  
She gets back to her bus and her phone is already ringing. She picks up and Bianca shrieks into her ear, "Gabe, you sly little thing!"  
  
Gabi falls back into her bunk and laughs until her stomach hurts.  
  
She calls her dad and Ricky to let them know and they’re full of congratulations and questions. She answers them as best she can, and by the time she’s hung up, she has over fifty new text messages congratulating her on the news.  
  
She calls William and says, “How many people have called you so far?”  
  
He groans tiredly. “God. Don’t even ask. I don’t even want to see my phone bill for this month, it’s going to be awful.”  
  
She starts cracking up and after a moment, he joins in.  
  
  
  
Gabi looks over at Ryland and nods. He starts the riff for the next song, and Gabi holds up her hands in the Cobra hand sign. The crowd responds eagerly, screaming out in reply.  
  
The heat is rising off the asphalt in slow, undulating waves. Gabi stands on stage, looking out over the sea of sweating kids and shouts, “Now it’s time for Snakes on a motherfucking Plane! Everyone welcome my husband William Beckett to the stage!”  
  
William struts on and wraps an arm around her waist as the crowd screams joyfully. The sun glints off their matching wedding rings and he kisses her cheek fondly. Gabi grins, takes a deep breath, and sings.


End file.
